Diablo 3: YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS

Diablo III is in open beta this weekend! And yet… I still have no friends to play it with!
By Homodoctus

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Posted by Shawn Handyside on April 21, 2012 · 7:53 PM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (109 votes, average: 4.17 out of 5)
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Categories:
Blizzard, Depressing, Diablo, PC, Rage Faces

· Leave a comment (142 Comments)





 

142 Responses to “YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS”

  1. Sir Alpar the Epic on April 21st, 2012 8:03 pm

    I've heard that the amount of players keep getting limited and that they've had problems. Glad I've had the beta for awhile now. :D

    So even if you had friends, you can't get online. :P

    I bet a lot of us are getting the game. I will soon enough. I hope they don't run out as i never pre-ordered it. I bet I could buy it online though.

  2. TheTopHatKid on April 21st, 2012 8:08 pm

    That soul-crushing moment when my video card isn't supported.

  3. DiamyoAlex on April 21st, 2012 8:16 pm

    You know its bad when your video games start insulting you…

  4. spplmj on April 21st, 2012 8:20 pm

    I had friends once, It was awful.

    They kept asking me things like if they could borrow money, give them rides, run into the airport carrying a backpack they had kindly filled with a "surprise".

    moral of the story is friends suck.

  5. ChaosController on April 21st, 2012 8:22 pm
  6. Valvatorez on April 21st, 2012 8:23 pm

    I still hasn't finished downloading yet…

    Oh well, at least I have Tales of Graces f with me to entertain me until then

  7. Dycro on April 21st, 2012 8:37 pm

    I'd play it except I already beat it. Not really the kind of game that's all that much fun when you stop making progress and stop getting new drops.

  8. Alpar on April 21st, 2012 8:38 pm

    Tales of Graces f would like to disagree.

  9. Alpar on April 21st, 2012 8:40 pm

    You

    brofist

    NOW.

  10. Skrist on April 21st, 2012 8:47 pm

    Tales of Vesperia friends are better.

  11. BTSnoogans on April 21st, 2012 8:54 pm

    The best friends are from Ar Tonelico. Just look at the things that they'll do for each other. http://www.halolz.com/2009/01/26/video-ooh-innuen

  12. BTSnoogans on April 21st, 2012 8:56 pm

    Huh. So that's why they call it a beta.

  13. Alpar on April 21st, 2012 9:01 pm

    Seriously speaking, Symphonia had the best friendship next to Graces.

    Vesperia's gang was best for kicks and getting things done, definitely.

  14. Valvatorez on April 21st, 2012 9:01 pm

    * brofist *

  15. NekoKnight on April 21st, 2012 9:14 pm

    In the Alpha stage of development the screen said "Friends? Have every hardcore player fight one another until there is one left standing. Only he deserves to be your friend. What are you doing playing video games? Go NTR someone's girlfriend!"

    And thus the developers had to start beta because people were too busy being successful in life to test the game.

  16. Fuzzy_Alfalfa on April 21st, 2012 9:28 pm

    Except for the part where that is from Teen's react, which was stupid and showed the ignorance of the teens involved.

  17. Kindly_Absurd on April 21st, 2012 9:38 pm

    Ah yes, the kingdom of Forever Alone, I have traveled there and seen it's wonders, though it lacks for any form of comfort.

  18. NotB0b on April 21st, 2012 9:54 pm

    *Looks at Halolz ads* 2 Rip-offs of Evony with semi-naked women and something called "Slimy Thief" down the bottom…
    Surprisingly fitting the lack of friend post.

  19. Vabolo on April 21st, 2012 9:56 pm

    "YOU HAVE NO DIABLO

    use your credit card number to add a Diablo"

    yeah this finally gonna work

    <img src="http://jugglingequipment.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/5e06319eda06f020e43594a9c230972d/b/a/babache-tornado-red.jpg&quot; img="">

    well shit

  20. EliminatorZigma on April 21st, 2012 10:10 pm

    Speaking of which, anyone know where I can get a raw reference for the Halolz background? I noticed Shawn finally changed it from the Xmas theme, but I was still wanting to draw an MLP/TF2 background. The full background would be great, but just the dimensions would also be nice. (I can't seem to find it in the HTML)

  21. Deep Thought on April 21st, 2012 10:21 pm

    That feel when you don't have Diablo III yet…

  22. Jimmy on April 21st, 2012 10:22 pm

    *Brohoofs*

    Duuuudes…the two-part season finale was BEYOND EPIC. Show for little girls? PFT!!! And again to you sir I say "PFT!!!"

    This is a show for gentlemen!!!

    SPOILER WARNING!!!:

    Changelings?
    Bucking?
    More than one male character?
    Awesome music?
    LYRA TALKING?
    VINYL SCRATCH (a.k.a DJ P0N3)?
    DOUBLE RAINBOW DASH?!?
    AWWWW YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

    Canterlot wedding
    rel="nofollow">Part 1

    rel="nofollow"> Part 2

  23. Prof. Luigi on April 21st, 2012 10:54 pm

    *saturn-ring explosion that is so popular these days*

  24. Prof. Luigi on April 21st, 2012 10:54 pm
  25. Prof. Luigi on April 21st, 2012 10:55 pm

    You know games are bad when they rip offs of rip offs.

  26. Prof. Luigi on April 21st, 2012 10:57 pm

    I wanna get 2 now and sit on them.
    I'm not sure why.

  27. Alpar12345678 on April 21st, 2012 11:03 pm

    But what if the internet runs out? What if one day we wake up, and what we once thought infinite, the internet, is nowhere to be found!?

    Alas, internet, I knew thee well.
    TOO WELL OH LORD THE SCARRING MEMORIES

    <img src="http://www.halolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/kirby.jpg"&gt;

  28. spartann30 on April 21st, 2012 11:25 pm

    dude, Alpar fools ended a LOOONG time ago.

    Allso fuck you

  29. BraveSirJimOfLawl on April 21st, 2012 11:33 pm

    I thought that guy died hundreds of years ago?

  30. BraveSirJimOfLawl on April 21st, 2012 11:37 pm

    IT BUUUUUUUUUURNNS!
    IT FUCKING BUUUURNS!
    WHY ALPAR 12345678!?
    WHYYYYYYYYYY!?!?

  31. EliminatorZigma on April 21st, 2012 11:38 pm

    Suction cup ass.

  32. Prof. Luigi on April 21st, 2012 11:43 pm

    Obviously, RandomExplosion is hundreds of years old.

  33. Marzen on April 21st, 2012 11:45 pm

    I have Battle.net friends. I have Starcraft 2! :D

  34. RandomExplosion on April 21st, 2012 11:49 pm
  35. Sir Alpar the Epic on April 22nd, 2012 12:18 am

    I have Starcraft 2 :D but that doesn't fix my problem of not having friends. Maybe I'll pull some friends out of the box I keep in the basement. Where do you keep your friends? They start taking up room and smelling and get pretty loud sometimes.

  36. Red on April 22nd, 2012 12:20 am

    Guess who's back…

    LET US MAKE PARTY!!!

    GIFSoup

    By the by, are the ponies gone yet?

  37. Cirno on April 22nd, 2012 12:21 am

    I have this frozen frog, does that count as a friend?

  38. TomQuoVadis on April 22nd, 2012 12:29 am

    This is why I use adblocker.

  39. Alpar12345678 on April 22nd, 2012 12:33 am

    *Dude, Alpar Fails day ended a LOOONG time ago.

  40. Sir Alpar the Epic on April 22nd, 2012 12:35 am

    Once you go pony there is no going back. Ponies are with us forever. Like the internets, or Christmas fruitcake.

  41. Alpar12345678 on April 22nd, 2012 12:37 am

    Does it look nothing like a frog and make random weird beeping noises?

    Yes either way.

  42. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 12:42 am

    My freind is a bunch of dolls, and Utsuho, And Cirno, And a certain Guy named linkorsomthing.

  43. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 12:45 am

    That must suck ass then.

  44. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 12:50 am

    Not scary enough….or a cake, make another one

    . <img src="http://i.imgur.com/Ouoi9.jpg&quot; alt="" title="Hosted by imgur.com" />

  45. Drjolt on April 22nd, 2012 12:55 am

    OR DID YOU KIIIIILLLL THEM?

  46. Skrist on April 22nd, 2012 1:07 am

    I have no idea what you are talking about you odd person. *Looking around suspiciously*

  47. Skrist on April 22nd, 2012 1:08 am

    Words that Zynga lives off of.

  48. Red on April 22nd, 2012 1:09 am

    cake you say? do go on

  49. Utsuho on April 22nd, 2012 1:18 am

    I have my master Satori, and my buttbuddy Orin<3

  50. LinkorZelda on April 22nd, 2012 1:28 am

    I'm itching to get some friends.
    <img src="http://gifsoup.com/imager.php?id=3577269&t=o&quot; border="0"/>GIFSoup

  51. Cirno on April 22nd, 2012 1:30 am

    There's this creepy Yuki-Onna who makes me call her Mom, this weird lady in plaid who's really scary, there's the fairy who lives with me at Misty lake too… but sometimes she touches me in funny places and tries to cuddle me when I sleep.

  52. Utsuho on April 22nd, 2012 1:31 am

    What about that Letty chick that you hang out during the winter months?

  53. Skrist on April 22nd, 2012 1:46 am

    rel="nofollow">Let me share the reaction to the reaction. They do it better than Teens React. Who knew?

  54. Skrist on April 22nd, 2012 1:47 am

    http://www.halolz.com/halolzbg-default.gif
    That should be it, if not then… good luck.

  55. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 1:53 am

    Hey! Yuuka is a good friend of mine…..Kinda…Its hard to explain.

  56. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 1:55 am

    LOL, Remember that time I locked Orin in the closet, and you in a lead lined box.

  57. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 1:56 am

    I think thats the creepy Yuki-Onna…. Uranium Baka.

  58. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 1:58 am

    Oh shit its a Dalek.

  59. Sir Alpar the Epic on April 22nd, 2012 2:09 am

    Well you see Red, when a mixer and cake mix love each other very much… And that's how cake is made. Now one day this cake will come to terms with his existence and solemnly walk to the valve headquarters. There he submits to his fate and is consumed by a hat loving man known only as GabeN. That is the life cycle of cake, so it has been and so it shall be. Ever since the days of Marie Antoinette this viscous cycle of deliciousness has gone on. We live by the cake, for the cake, alongside the cake, in hopes that our dreams of a 3rd half-life will come. Amen.

  60. Utsuho on April 22nd, 2012 2:17 am

    Orin came out of the closet along time ago brah
    >Orin is buttbuddy

  61. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 2:28 am

    Oh, uh those bruises on Orin aren't my doing…..
    *Takes three steps to the door*

  62. Kindly_Absurd on April 22nd, 2012 2:28 am

    I have traveled the kingdom of Forever Alone, beheld it's wonders, from the mountains of Sex Dollopolis, to the oceans of isolated souls, but there's no place like halolz.

  63. Utsuho on April 22nd, 2012 2:35 am
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  126. Alice_M on April 22nd, 2012 2:41 am

    <img src="http://i.imgur.com/0NZlt.jpg&quot; alt="" title="Hosted by imgur.com" />

    Vous en colère.?

  127. Red on April 22nd, 2012 3:57 am

    But, Valve can't count to three. It's like they learned how to count from King Arthur.

  128. JordanTH on April 22nd, 2012 4:05 am

    Oh god, don't get me started on the Teens React… ugh.

  129. Alpwan on April 22nd, 2012 5:05 am

    So, what you're saying, basically, is that Valve will release Half-Life 5 before the third one?
    Seems fully plausible…

  130. Paulrus-Keaton? on April 22nd, 2012 5:16 am

    Ugh… Pinkie's got fleas again.
    Someone hold her down, I'll get the Frontline.

  131. Paulrus-Keaton? on April 22nd, 2012 5:17 am

    Then stop befriending members of down-and-out terrorist cells, you ninny.

  132. vash_ts on April 22nd, 2012 7:15 am

    maybe Half life 2 episode 2 part 2
    or Half life 2: The prequel (adventures from the rebel point of view!)

  133. vash_ts on April 22nd, 2012 7:17 am

    My keen senses tell me you are Dash12345678

    Your cover is blown, surrender now!

  134. Oddball on April 22nd, 2012 10:07 am

    while you were gone we had a party on top of a mountain but sadly you missed it

  135. PaladinVance on April 22nd, 2012 10:55 am

    when did this happen? EqD's old system baffled me to no end

  136. dope92 on April 22nd, 2012 12:42 pm

    thats for dogs.

    GET THE SHEARS!!!

  137. dope92 on April 22nd, 2012 12:44 pm

    huh.

    do i need to construct additional pylons to be your friend?

  138. Jimmy on April 22nd, 2012 1:39 pm

    DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE!!!

    Where the **** have you been?

  139. EliminatorZigma on April 22nd, 2012 2:09 pm

    A few weeks ago, I think. It's glorious now.

  140. EliminatorZigma on April 22nd, 2012 2:09 pm

    You should see the Bronies React to Teens React video.

  141. EliminatorZigma on April 22nd, 2012 2:10 pm
  142. Korotini_Notlad on April 23rd, 2012 3:50 pm

    Who needs friends when I got the Skullgirls to keep me company?

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