You probably thought Professor Oak kept that last starter Pokemon for himself. Well you’re DEAD WRONG! I mean who needs another mouth to feed around the lab anyway?
Another original video by Dorkly!
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on June 2, 2011 · 6:44 PM
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Categories: Depressing, Gameboy, Nintendo, Pokémon, Video Clips · Leave a comment (96 Comments) |
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Email your video game related LOLZ to and if it's good we'll post it!
Did you know the site has over 2,500 video game themed lolz? 
Get Sara McLaughlan on the phone. Maybe she and the ASPCA can help this cause.
Great. Now I feel sorry for them since I always go for Fire Starter…
It only died because Oak is a Nuzlocker.
This also explains why he never battles, why he has so much back-story, and why he needs you to travel for him. He can't train Pokemon because they'll die. This probably drove him mad, hence the incredible amnesia (can't remember his grandson's name, or his best grandson's best friend's name and gender), solitary lifestyle, and this video here. He's fighting with madness because he's unable to train for his profession, and now has psychopathic desires!
Somebody call officer Jenny! Send her to my house!
Oh yeah, and get some therapist for Oak too I suppose.
I noticed that three of the Pokemon at the end are the ones I've picked before (Bulbasaur, Chikorita and Turtwig). That just means that I've sent a water-type to it's death (except in the fourth and fifth generations, since they got a trainer, too.)
I was just thinking how the only thing missing from this video was the rel="nofollow"> SADDEST SONG EVER
How many times must he have done this to get to lvl 62 by only killing lvl 1 pokèmon? Maybe killing them gives you more xp than just making them faint…
We ought to fix this problem by having three trainers pick at a time. The main character, the rival, and a creepy boy who follows both around drooling and snapping photos at inopportune moments. Wait, that's not much better a fate for the third pokemon…
So wait…Oak tosses the bodies of dead pokemon, wrapped in trashbags, into the garbage. Seeing that several pokemon have what would be considered supernatural powers, it's not a stretch to think that they're bodies have supernatural components as well, and the decomposition of said bodies could set off all kinds of reactions with the surrounding materials: garbage, in this instance. Adding this to the theory that all Ghost Type Pokemon are in fact, ghosts of once-living pokemon, implying that the spirit of a dead pokemon has the capability to retain altered form and sentience…
…is it not possible that, with the combination of a decomposing pokemon body surrounded by garbage, combined with its spirit somehow trapped in the trashbag its body was encased it…we'd wind up with something like this guy here?
So wait…Oak tosses the bodies of dead pokemon, wrapped in trashbags, into the garbage. Seeing that several pokemon have what would be considered supernatural powers, it's not a stretch to think that they're bodies have supernatural components as well, and the decomposition of said bodies could set off all kinds of reactions with the surrounding materials: garbage, in this instance. Adding this to the theory that all Ghost Type Pokemon are in fact, ghosts of once-living pokemon, implying that the spirit of a dead pokemon has the capability to retain altered form and sentience…
…is it not possible that, with the combination of a decomposing pokemon body surrounded by garbage, combined with its spirit somehow trapped in the trashbag its body was encased it…we'd wind up with something like this guy here?
At Lv 1, I wouldn't want it either.
Because imprisoning them in a digital box when you're only going to use six Pokemon is a better moral decision.
<img src="http://emotibot.net/pix/1889.jpg">
Good night, unused starters… we will never forget you…
Professor oak is DEAD serious when dealing with eutanasia.
Wait a sec…..Bulbasaur is a part Poison type Pokemon, he should be immune to the Potassium chloride that Oak injected into him
I would have picked rel="nofollow">this, but i bow to your superior sadface-causing music.
That is a very legit theory, my good sir.
More ePeen for you. Mostly because you involved Trubbish within your brilliance.
In case you aren't aware, I fucking love garbage monsters.
*smartglasses*
I personally and respectfully disagree with you theory, given how most ghost-types have no real physical body to speak of and (keep in mind I havent watched the show in years and havent seen many Gen 5 mon's) I personally have never seen possesion as a move or signs of possesed objects on any ghost-types.
Piplup was the only water starter I liked, mostly because it turned into a badass emperor penguin. Aside from that….
those eyes…those piercing, bulbasaur eyes…… fine! have my cookie! just stop looking at me like that!!
Hey, at least Shawn’s finally acknowledging things they get from Dorkly. *cough*Facebook Attorney*cough*
-rebuttalglasses-
Ah, but you're forgetting Shuppet and Banette, who are nothing more than inanimate objects given life by malevolent spirits.
I'm do sorry Bulbasaur,Chikorita, Treecko and Infernape!
Wait aren't all the starters level 5!?!
Jesus! This explains Gary's dickish attitude.
He knows that his grandfather is a nuzlocker but wants to follow in his father's footsteps as a Pokemon researcher. Sadly, Prof. Oak wants Gary to vicariously live through his son so that he can feel the harmless adventure that he never had. Gary disdains this fact and explains why he always tries to abuse the main trainer out of insecurity of whether to acknowledge his grandfather's wishes to follow his own path.
Get me some Hook- I mean Cheerleaders!
This Boy needs some friendship time!
I thought that was just their apperance. I withdraw my theory, but will leave the comment there for the lulz.
Then Green walks in and says
"Hey Gramps! I'm here for my pokemon!"
Don't *sniff* remind me *sniff sniff* of those ads *breaks down and cries, thinking of the sad puppies*
U don't liek mudkipz?!?!?!?!?!?!?
rel="nofollow">
rel="nofollow">Let me play you a sad song in the world smalest violin
theres a reason he wasnt picked
Nope, poison is only 1/2 effective against other poison pokemon.
But poison types can't become poisoned
This is why I only use ghost types.
tl;dr
Approached was misspelled.
shhhhh. Do you want the world to implode again in the same manner as teaching a Slowpoke to forget amnesia?
<img src=http://www.examiner.com/images/blog/EXID13006/images/oscar50.jpg>
The OG garbage pokemon, when he levels up he gets spikes on his can and an improve ability "Get Off My Lawn."
I…I actually cried a little there.
Completely forgot about that treeko that was stuck in Birch's lab
(Yes I played 3rd gen… assholes)
So whenever I go back to the Pokemon lab and checked the last Pokeball, it was actually empty?
Why didn't he just give me the last Pokemon? :(
MURDERER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >: (
I assume said digital box is like a virtual wilderness that you can choose, hence why you can change the box's theme to fit the Pokemon's original habitat so they will be more comfortable living in there
But then again, if that is true, then someone might choose a sea floor themed box and put a non-fish Pokemon there for the lulz, and assuming the digtal box can replicate the environment perfectly, then said non-fish Pokemon will suffer in darkness and drown to death
Oak: O.O' "oops… forgot about you…" Me:(aka: in the shoes of what Blue says ) "I wonder what will happen to Bulbasaur… HEY RED WANT TO POKEMON BATTLE?! >:D "
I MADE MY SLOWPOKE FORGET AMNESIA!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! *world implodes*
Bad pun… in the words of Gannon from the unholy Triforce. YOU WILL DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Suddenly.
Odie to Minions all over again.
But we can fix that…. *takes out rare candy*
….with lots and lots of drugs!
rel="nofollow"> Obligatory.
Thankfully, this was no longer a problem as of Generation IV, as all 3 starters are in use.
But if this is true, why is that pokeball (which is still full when you examine it) still there for all eternity?
So what does that make Lucas/Dawn and Bianca?
Who says it's full?
SPELLING HAMMER!
*so
Just saying.
SPELLING HAMMER/ LANGUAGE HAMMER!!!!
*euthanasia. You either misspelled it or put it in Spanish.
He's referring to the type effectiveness, not the status affliction. Where's my free hat?
My heart broke cause Bulbasaur was my very first poke'mon when i was a weee little girl ;-;
Maybe it was a bad idea to put my Slowpoke and my Groudon in the same box…
Water type starters have a history of turning into badasses. A turtle with cannons, a freaking crocodile, a walking fish that can throw boulders, an armored penguin, and a Samurai Walrus.
Fuck yeah.
He needed it for it's… heat…
Gen III was a boss. The complete rejuvenation for pokemon. Better berries, wireless testing, a battle frontier, Gen III was the modernization of pokemon.
and what of Rotom? He possesses things. Not really relevant…
I'm not malevolent! I'm just misunderstood!
How could someone let a Mudkip die like that? The only Pokemon listed at the end of the video that deserves to die is Oshawott. But not Mudkip!
i dont beleive it, how could throw away my mudkip. do these people not like their mudkipz???
Oh… That answers my question. (See this post: http://www.halolz.com/2010/11/03/advice-oak-bulba…
inb4 nogirlsontheinternet
What about Tepig? That damn piece of bacon turned into a Flaming Sumo Wrestler with lockjaw.
so, oak is just creating a circle of life? or in this case a circle of death?
good ole'… um……*psst* ash what was there names again?
water types, cuddly at first, than turn into gaint, bi-pedal killing machines, fuck yah!
What did you think of Bianca when playing Pokémon Black/White? She was an incompetent shit you may say? A random bitch who has no clue about being a trainer? Well, she's the reason a Pokémon did not perish you sick fuck.
Ode to Companions more likely
…
wait a minute…
TO THE BITF FORUMS!
SEE?
*removes beret, stands to attention, salutes*
Perhaps that is where Red and Ethan's Pokémon went after Mt. Silver blew them away…
The worst part is that Oak is level 62, just think of how many times he's done this
actually, oshawott starts out bipedal, but evolves into a quadrupedal machine of death, it's the fire starter that goes from quadrupedal to bipedal killing machine, and Snivy just becomes a snake, instead of one with tiny arms/legs
Wait. Why are the best ones shown at the end? I can't live without my Liquid (the) Oshawott!
It's Double Drop Week. You'll be fine on your own.
Croatians.
When you examine it it says it's the last pokemon. And in the manga, you can tell if a pokemon inside a pokeball even when it's closed. And since the manga > the anime, I say you can tell.
Bianca may have been stupid, but she was still less annoying than Brendan/May.
…I can't argue with that.
It's okay, it's okay, they helped all those puppies find loving homes. In mountains.
Actually Gen 2 already introduced the concept of a battle frontier in the Crystal version. Berries were introduced in gen 2 yes, but they were extensions, not really pioneers. But I'll give it points for wireless testing.
I'll have to say gen 5 has been pretty freaking fun, but my overall favorite gen has to be 2.
And please, nobody call me "blinded by nostalgia" or anything of the sort.
Oh, crap. I just realized that the latter games tend to let you pick even more Pokemon from these professors.
He doesn't even have an excuse now, he's just killing for the lulz.
Jeez, even I liked that! I think it would be better with that one chick and that shitty song that comes on and ruins your mood when you're watching comedy central though…
OBJECTION! Bulbasaur was given to Blue's sister Green an hour after he and Red left Prof. Oak's lab! YOU LOSE, YOU GET NOTHING! GOOD DAY, SIR!
<img src=http://www.seinfeldscripts.com/images/soupnazi.jpg>
No +1s for you! One week!
well there goes my happy mood…
you sir are win, Gen 2 is boss +1 for you
(am i doin it rite)
that's not liquid Oshawott, It's Revolver Oshawott!
Yes
yes you are. And I humbly thank you.
Is it bad that 3 of the 5 pokemon listed at the end of the video are the ones I've chosen over the years?
See? THIS is how all those awesome theories (And creepy-pastas) surrounding Pokémon is started! Arceus, I love you Halolz. Don't ever change.
I've said it before, and I will say it again.
<img src="http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2010/255/9/b/futachimaru_by_goldenpika-d2ylc9g.png" alt="" />
This dude is freakin' badass!
Considering the terrible traumatizing things Bulbasaur has seen with green… yeeeeeah. Might be better this way. >.> See: http://tinyurl.com/ylnslsj and http://tinyurl.com/6atrbhx