The key to playing a good pyro has always been strategy!
By gheistlich
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on January 8, 2011 · 3:12 AM
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Categories: Charts & Graphs, PC, Playstation, Team Fortress 2, Things Are Heating Up, Valve Software, Xbox 360 · Leave a comment (68 Comments) |
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Did you know the site has over 2,500 video game themed lolz? 
My favorite part?
KILL IT WITH FIRE
What game is this for? The only game I know that has a Pyro that looks like that is about trading hats so all this 'kill it with fire' and 'capturing objectives' wouldn't make sense.
Has anyone here seen Office Space? Milton totally follows this chart, with a few tweaks, of course.
What? Objectives? Killing? What were you looking at? I just saw a Pyro rushing towards one of his/her/its hats. I think there might have been some words in the way or something though. Probably to symbolize other people's trade requests in the chat box that make yours less noticeable.
Of course, its when your "hudda hudda huh"-ing that the dead ringer spies getcha.
actually I hardly do W+M1 at all, and I play pyro all the time
….
I should though. :I
"If all else fails, use Fire." Guess the Pyro took that advice to heart.
What if it doesn't die?
"Hudda Hudda Huh!" in the ancient Pyronian language roughly translates to "It's as easy as a flowchart"
KILL IT WITH FIRE ON MOTORCYCLES?
Acient Pyro flowchart says man who burns shall be killed with fire!
Solution: Burn everything
They forgot the part that says
"Does it shoot a large projectile?"
—>No: Kill it with FIRE
—>Yes: Airblast the projectile. Is it dead yet? —> No: Kill it with FIRE
what about hammer drum parties?
Kill all sons of b*tches
That is my official instruction.
Oh yeah and never let go of the fire button..
Use more gun.
Naturally.
*Snorting laughter*
that's too skilled for most pyro players.
Pyro's easy to play, but it takes a little experience to play well.
Ellis edition grammer hammer!
*'Ficial*
need to learn to speak hick, mate! XD
scource: rel="nofollow">
Nowadays you can do the general tf2 flowchart:
Are you trading hats?
No: Stop playing the worlds finest hat trading mmorpg.
Yes: Carry on playing the worlds finest hat trading mmorpg.
NO
or fire in this case
DOUSE IT WITH WATER ON FIRETRUCKS!!
I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHER@#$%ING MOTORCYCLE JOKES IN MY MOTHER@!#^ING HALOLZ.
I'm sorry to inform you all, but this only applies to a Pyro without a obligations of being a Utility Pyro, unlike myself. The definition of Utility Pyro refers to any Pyro that places Homewrecking sappers or extinguishing team-mates on fire at a higher priority rather than to kill things with fire. Of course, this could only mean that unless one is a mediocre Pyro or a back-burning one, this flowchart is quite inaccurate.
Disregard that I will still hunt down and burn anything that touches my glove to the depths of hell and back.
How come I never notice this stop-playing-and-trade-hats thing? Maybe because I play on european servers o_O?
):<
Are you trading hats?
Yes: Carry on playing the worlds finest hat trading mmorpg.
No: Start trading hats.
Fix'd
Win.
Kill it with fire is also an answer for "What do you do with witches?"
MOTORCYCLE JOKES IN HALOLZ?!
Cheers.
*Cigarette flick*
Is it on fire? (Yes) —> Apply Axtinguisher Until Dead
Is it dead and a spy? (Yes) —-> Spaz out with flamethrower to make sure entire area is both on fire and the spy is dead.
Do you have the Intel? (Yes) —-> What the hell are you doing reading this flowchart, You're obviously too skilled to play Pyro you noob. Go home and be a soldier man!
Heavy Flow Chart
Does it move?
Yes: Shoot it
No: Shoot it
Is it hurting your medic?
Yes: Shoot it
No Shoot it anyway
Is it a scout meleeing you?
Yes: Go Heavy Turtle and wait for Death
No: Shoot it
Did you just hear a spy de-cloak?
Yes: Turn up mouse sensitivity and shoot EVERYWHERE!
No: Shoot Everywhere
Do you have a medic?
Yes: Win by Default
No: Die by Default
Halolz on motorbikes?
BUILD A BRIDGE OUT OF HER!
Oh and don't forget:
Is it far away?
—> Yes —> Kill it with FLARE
—> No —> Kill it with FIRE
Motorbikes on Halolz?
No. Just….No.
Well, first you gotta make sure…
Does she float?
Or, better yet, play pyro using a driving game controller, setting the gas pedal as W and M1, and drive around.
I'd imagine the spy flowchart would reach the ceiling.
demoman would be:
Are you demopan/demoknight/Talibanman?
Y-charge toward whatever moves and demopan then run away while spamming grenades
N-continue
Are You on defense?
Y-spam stickies
N-spam grenades
I'm glad he did not take Zelda 2's other main piece of advice to heart as well:
I am Error.
My flowchart would be as follows:
Are you a demoman?
Yes: Continue
No: Respawn as Demoman
Are you alive?
Yes: Recklessly charge the enemy with grenade launcher
No: Wait until true
http://www.halolz.com/2010/11/30/weezil-slipshadow/
Are you using a backburner? (Yes) —> Run at full tilt with your flamethrower blazing until you die.
Are you using the Degreaser? (Yes) —-> Immediately forget where ammo boxes are.
Are you using the Power Jack? (Yes) —-> Why the hell aren't you using the axtinguisher?
Do you have a medic? (Yes) —-> Do you have air blasting? (No) —-> Wonder why your medic dies a lot as you charge forward. <—— (No) Did you airblast him when you saw a pyro in the area attacking?
I approve of this man's correct pronunciation of official matters. ('FICIAL SEAL OF APPROVAL)
[THIS JUST GOT STAMPED BY MY BUDDY KEITH]
Do you have the caber?
Yes-Put on charging Targe and lol around.
No-Go get one.
Don't have a charging targe? Then sneak around, get behind people, blow them up, and quickly say "ssssssssssssssssssss"
actually based on my original comment I would have to say that I have a pretty damn good idea of how hard other strategies are… :\
I hope this thing works
<img src="http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/7444/spycheck.jpg" alt="Image Hosted by ImageShack.us"/>
Seriously, what's with all the people talking about laptops sucking for TF2? I'm BETTER with a laptop.
Soldier''s actually easy. If you want a class that takes skill, pick any Support class.
Hats: The cancer that is killing tf2
It's more likely than you think. Click rel="nofollow">here for a free Motorcycle check.
Either get out of the water or use the rake.
Waitaminute….shouldn't you be first Barry Allen?
well at least now we know the nationality of the pyro…poor and irish
Oh sweet, motorcycles! *click* HEY!
It would hurt my E-Peen sadly.
I'd just like to point out that the unfortunate yet inevitable end of the Pyro flowchart is hide. There is no win. There is no end in sight except to hide. If you play Pyro, you can never escape until you hide. Thankfully, there's also no dead option.
IMMORTAL PYRO!!!!! HUDDA HUDDA HUH!
Y: BUILD A BRIDGE OUT OF HER!!!
N: Check her apartments for Newts to be sure.
Does her apartment have newts?
Y: Nurse them back to humanity, then BUILD A BRIDGE OUT OF HER!
N: Better build that bridge out of tiny tiny rocks.
I play with a laptop, but I think they were referring to if you were using a trackpad instead of a mouse.
I do use a trackpad.
I'm actually the guy who made this, and I have to say, that's a freaking amazing idea, and I'm adding it to the description on its dA page.
xDDD
if you read the description on the dA page (the author link), you'll see I make no bones about the fact that I made this whole thing as a joke, and even titled it "tha_joke.jpg"
I'm actually a reflect-heavy pyro myself.
Me too, that's why I put it in a subroutine box, with flames, and made it red. :>
I'm being too negative with this. That and it's a blight on my e-peen.