Somewhere this Pokemon battle went horribly, HORRIBLY wrong.
A DirtPony comic, submitted by Mauricio
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on November 28, 2010 · 11:46 AM
  (506 votes, average: 4.52 out of 5) Loading ... |
168 Responses to “MACHOKE used POUND!”
You could also say it's because a trainer used an evolved form against a stage one pokemon. That usually doesn't end well for the stage one.
I think that the sleep powder was a held item although it could have been wearing a muscle belt……
Since when could pokemon use 5 moves in battle?
Nah. 4Chan did that. I got better.
Ah hell, I did it again.
Thank you.
It's not rape if she can't use Disable.
It's not rape if she cant use Disable :P
Pardon me sir, but I believe you accidentally put a great deal of FAIL in your comment.
I counted and uhh… THE MACHOKE HAS FIVE FREAKING MOVES. WTF… also LEER DOESNT CONFUSE!!!!!!!
Mmmyes, quite.
I'm guessing that drill pierced through something.
*Boo'd off internet*
Rule 34 Triumphs again!
I can`t let you object that!
Clearly, you don't belong on the internet. Go and make an impact on someone's life, you reality lurker!
Clefairy hasn't been fucked like that since she was in an egg.
Nothing…nothing…nothing is safe from Halolz!
machoke just couldnt resist DAT ASS
Hmm.. reminds of that Oak/Ditto accident
Well, that's what you get for living at the top of a mountain, now isn't it?
now that was funny. i'm surprised he wasn't into jynx.
"She" is really a guy
Congratulations! Your Machoke learned Hydro Pump!
They are now!
No, he used Hydro Pump
something is a little strange about the trainer on the right
Feel free to leave a comment...
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Email your video game related LOLZ to and if it's good we'll post it!
Did you know the site has over 2,500 video game themed lolz? 
OBJECTION!
Leer doesn't confuse, it lowers defense
wrong comic is wrong!
If the Day Care Couple saw this, they'd definately know where eggs come from.
I could swear I've seen this in Halolz before… Oh well.
Am I the only one who noticed…
The Machoke has 5 moves?
How dare Machoke be able to know five moves! SLEEP POWDER, CHARM, HARDEN, LEER and POUND!? PREPOSTEROUS!
Well that, plus Machoke knows 5 moves, 4 of which he can't actually learn. Also, Machoke is missing his championship belt (though it could be saucily laying on the bedroom floor). He's also drawn with 3 fingers, even though he actually has five.
And weirder still, a Machoke has managed to date-rape a Clefairy all under the guise of a pokemon battle? The respective trainers have followed them through the sunset into the bar and then to the bedroom without once calling 'return'? Though funny, a lot this comic is in error.
…But maybe I'm being too picky…
Machoke Used Pound! It's FUCKING effective!
It seems that Machoke really
-sunglasses-
… put the moves on her
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
machoke looks like a dinosaur o.O
Now honestly, what's more disturbing? The bottom left panel or the face of the "girl" trainer in the bottom right panel?
Oi, this Machoke must have some sex problems, If he doesn't have place for String Shot…
btw second trainer is wearing a skirt, what the hell.
Alright, you deserve that one, these jokes are hard to make so…
In a comment somewhere.
Wow, look at Machoke's nipples when he uses harden… X(
I probably posted this one too a while back…I vaguely remember an instance that I had…DAMN YOU SHAWN!!!
Machoke used Gunk Shot!
thats a girl? i thought it was a crossdressing guy :S
Did somebody say dinosaurs? :D
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Dinosaurs Dubbing.
Those are some ugly 12-year-olds. XD
You could probably cut glass with those nipples.
Oh they know where the eggs come from, They always knew.
At least this is better compared to ditto rape, you don't get to sleep through that,EVER!
I guess the sleep powder was a hold item…
Please tell me that did not just happen…
SOMEONE GET ME AN EYE BLEACHER!!!
once you go Machoke, you'll dun be broke…
Try a Clefairy, feel like Tyler Perry… I got nothin…
Machoke cannot learn sleep powder nor can it learn charm, and leer doesn’t confuse therefore this comic is wrong
That, and Sleep Powder is never Super Effective but who the fuck cares!? Rule of Funny, man!
0_0
Nasty.
It coulda been worse. one trainer coulda had a wailord, the other a skitty.
Somewhere this Pokemon battle went horribly, HORRIBLY RIGHT.
GI-GIT-TY;-)
Did he use string shot after harden?
What's worse is that "Lowers defense" probably would work better for this…
I suppose that's another way of using Bide.
It's next turn it will release it's energy!
5 moves? WTF HAX
another thing is that clefairy is in the fairy egg group while machop is in the humanshape group so machoke wouldn't be interested in the first place what's even worse is that without the belt on to restrict it's power it's not holding back 0_0.
CLEFAIRY woke up! CLEFAIRY is all out of PP! CLEFAIRY Struggled! CLEFAIRY was hurt by the recoil!
clefairy was badly poisoned!
I guess this Machoke didnt feeling Machoking his chicken tonite….
They must protect the children from the truth!
Very good question my friend.
Hmm…
I think it was when trainer 1 used a fighting type against a normal type. Machoke was going to win that battle one way or another.
I'm pretty sure Machoke doesn't know Harden, too.
OMFG XD
Not exactly whited, she was painted white.
NO! Without the belt his power level goes to…OVER 9000!!!!!!!
and now you brought to my mind anime rape scenes…
(-5689115 brain cells)
uh bad news mate, that second trainer is supposed to be a girl.
nah because Machoke already has 5 moves he can do and that's one too many. He'll just keep on using pound until he runs out of PP.
MACHOKE used POUND!
Both trainers fainted!
Clefairy was given a Potion to apply every week to the affected area.
Runs out of PP? Is Clefairy's snatch possessed by Lorena Bobbitt?
Screw glass, go for the diamonds.
When your Pokemon idea is too awesome, Nintendo steals it and nerfs it.
When you post an epic image in the comments, Mauricio submits it to Halolz and takes all the credit.
Clefairy chicks are out of this world.
Bul Leer drops down defense :2
I dunno what's scarier;
Machoke and Clefairy
or that "girl"
Apparently walking into sunsets brings you to a rave….
DAWN IS A MAN. *cuts out eyes*
Panel 5: http://unrealitymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/0…
Eyyyyyy
This is wrong, on so… SO many levels…
Time to go gouge out my mind's eye…
That post combined with your avatar is not only funny but fitting.
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAX!
So…are the Trainers going to call their Pokemon back or just stand by and watch? Cause then this comic goes from horribly wrong to horribly creepy wrong.
I call hax. That pokémon has 5 moves.
inb4 Bridget
EVERY male knows Harden, whatever they are!
And some female too… *cough*
Hey! Wouldn't YOU be confused by that look?
Only if you DON'T want it. After all, Ditto can mate with anything!
ANYTHING.
And the professors too…?
Lucius.
So what would that make Mew?
What if the Skitty was a Ditto and the Wailord was a Spah?
Then what would Struggle be like..?
And thus, a candidate for gen 5 was born.
MACHOKE used EXPLOSION!
CLEFAIRY fainted.
MACHOKE stole 200P after winning.
Clefairy needs an adult
Bullshit!
That Machoke knows more than 4 moves.
The real ones are bound up in a closet.
It turns out Machoke isn't the only one who can use submission.
WHAT IS THIS!?!?
Clefairies and Machokes aren't from the same egg group! >:O
If only Pokemon Black/White had that as actual in-game text…if only.
Don't know why they both look disgusted, this was all the plan of the Machoke's trainer, was it not he who called the shots?
What are the trainers so grossed about? One trainer must have taught Machoke those moves intentionally!
What, did he just look in the future, see who he was fighting and got a dirty thought?
There so many things wrong with this!! I mean c'mon lets be mature…Machoke can't learn sleep powder that's ridiculous!
Or in this case:
Trainer used Future Sight!
Trainer used Nasty Plot!
I guess we found out that the best thing about Clefairies is that they can't say no.
Then again…they weren't capable of doing so in the first place.
rel="nofollow"> rel="nofollow">…
Yes, I'm aware of the irony.
And as of this moment, you hold a +69 post. What're you going to do now?
Machoke refused to listen?
I'm going to BECOME A POKEMON MASTER
Well played.
So you are going to stay on a mountain until someone challenges you?
Yes. That is the plan.
With a laptop of course.
And wireless internet. TF2 will be needed to pass the time
I'll say something went wrong… Who sends out a normal type to battle a fighting type? Everyone knows fighting types are only weak against psychic and flying!
that won't do… we need adamantium!
The really disturbing part is that he HAS 5 MOVES! ABOMINATIONNNNN
Spycrabs, what else?
Obligatory.
Your Mother.
Pokémon: It's for kids!
Y'know come to think of it, nobody said this particular Clefairy was female…then again, nobody said they had a gender either…
Oh god. You linked to TV Tropes. Now nobody is going to comment on anything on Halolz for, like, a month. Nice job breaking it hero.
And thus rule 34 claims another piece of my childhood….woe is the future.
THE NIPPLES ARE NOW DIAMONDS.
I suggest a ban on links to TV Tropes. I waste enough of my time as it is.
You set yourself up for this one.
Of course I did. TV Tropes has ravaged my delicate mind for years. I can no longer help it.
Oh f… You took mah comment! D8
*head-screen*
Agreed.
Machoke is an adult.
YOU, sir, are one e-peen from the revered 69. I shall help you out.
+1
Your avatar. It fits.
Oh god, it never ends! DX>
That actually happened to me on my Gold once. .___. I were 10 and didn't know about the badge level limit.
Alert! The enemy has taken our comment!
I'd say the girl.
You just know she'll be in your nightmare.
LOL! I first saw this on the Fatherland!
Why was this comment negatized? Tsk, tsk, read your Pokedex, people.
But it can't mate with another Ditto… Hm….. Suspicious.
Sent some to Sugar Mama!
They took yer cawment!
I'm on a Rapidash.
How did it manage to do that? It's nowhere near as bad as Uncyclopedia. Uncyclopedia rapes your childhood, your perspective, your mother, and your cat, all at the same time.
This comic would be almost valid if the trainers were wearing Generation III (Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald, LeafGreen, FireRed) attire. In Generation III, Machoke could learn Metronome via Move Tutor, which would allow him access to those 5 moves, though he would only need it for 4. And I say almost valid because Leer will not confuse, it will lower defenses. I guess lowering defenses still works in this situation. Also, Sleep Powder will never be super effective. It’s a non-damaging, status inducing move. Being “charmed” is not a status. Clefairy’s attack stat is sharply reduced; a more suitable attack would be Attract, and it would be immobilized by love. I take that back, this comic isn’t close to valid.
FAIL.
What if someone with a Miltank shows up?
It's only implied that the Machoke is a male.
I they need kids to fill their pokedex (inculdong 3 starters) then they must never know
And +403927823092 dead puppies.
Wait…Machoke had 5 moves….WTF?!
(prepares to be bombarded with -1's for some reason)
That's why I don't sleep at night
The baby or just the aftereffects?
Dey tuk mah cuwment!
Rule 34: no exceptions!
Wait, is that Machoke doing a Fawnz immitation when he used Charm?
…and it's only implied that the Clefairy is a female…
Exactly.
I guess clefairy likes….
*Sunglasses*
to MACHOKE
Machoke used String Shot!
Clefairy's speed fell!
Machoke used Horn Drill!
Clefairy fainted!
It looks like Sugar Mama was [url