Be warned, in Skyrim the “F” in “The BFG” does not stand for friendly.
By wazlefish
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on December 20, 2011 · 2:09 PM
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Categories: Bethesda, Growth Spurt, PC, Playstation, Storytime/Wordplay, The Elder Scrolls, Xbox 360 · Leave a comment (63 Comments) |
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63 Responses to “The BFG”
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Hmm... it's that time of year again. Yep that's right, con season! We're hitting the road to meet fans, hock funny t-shirts and give out high-fives!
Then after that it's straight off to Dallas, Texas for A-Kon!
Email your video game related LOLZ to and if it's good we'll post it! (4.87 out of 5) (4.83 out of 5) (4.83 out of 5) (4.83 out of 5) (4.83 out of 5) (4.83 out of 5) (4.83 out of 5) (4.82 out of 5) (4.82 out of 5) (4.82 out of 5)(see more...)
Did you know the site has over 2,500 video game themed lolz? 
I heard you can get a meeting with this Fus guy. Watch out, though. I'm not going to try because I heard it's very easy to make him shout at you.
(I had problems deciding what BFG meant to me. Big Forest Giant? Big ___ing Giant? The possibilities! D:)
He can hear plants crying, but he's too busy bashing brains in to give a flying FUCK
{Only fans of the original book will get that, and if you haven't read it, you owe it to yourself to find a copy}
<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v508/mudmaniac/smith01.png" />
Smitty approved!
The Buggy Flying Glitch
(What's hilarious is when they hit your companions because they will actually survive)
Beast Flogging Giant? O_O
Is that Theodore Roosevelt and his big stick?
Now I can see him using a Doom BFG… Oh god the humanity.
A BFG with a BFG… I need an adult.
Here is an adult
<img src="http://img259.imageshack.us/img259/5954/pedovegeta.png" alt="Image Hosted by ImageShack.us"/>
<img src=http://www.addfunny.com/funnypictures/hodgepodge/46/skyrim.jpg>
Okay, my friend had a theory while he was playing Skyrim while drunk. We don't see any female giants… because mammoths are female giants.
Oh yeah
he totally loves waving that… policy around.
I AM AN ADULT!
Meh. The movie was better. Plus there are better novels out there. Like The Legend of Zelda Written, by SHYYEEAAAAHgeru MiyHAAAAAmoto.
Allow me to apply my PS skills to make this 3x creepier by making it actually look slightly real.
<img src="http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/8042/creeeeepy.png" />
The picture only made me smirk, not that great, i was thinking, doesn't look a lot like the BFG, small ears etc… then i scrolled down and read By Fus Roahl Dahl and lmao
<img src="http://i43.tinypic.com/20frxis.jpg" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic">
BFG9000
Luckily in Skyrim there are no Snozzcumbers.
I DON'T NEED YOUR HANDOUTS!
YOU CAN'T BUY ME HOT DOG MAN!
I THREW IT ON THE GROUND!
So apparently Xzibit's real name is Lucan Valerius
The bane of ever treasure hunter is carrying so much that they get Snozzcumbered.
GRAMMAR HAMMER!
*written by, not Written, by
Just realized that Giants use troll skulls for "protection."
Then I realized that there aren't any female giants.
relevancy?
BFG….hmm….well it could stand- I'm sorry am I the only one who's eyes went straight to the huge skull cock this Giant has?
I don't care what you think, this pun is epic.
And that's the first grammatical error I've made on Halolz since forever…
better start rebuilding…
He sells many items such as the Slashing Sword of Slashing, the Shielding Shield of Shielding, and a Novice Robes of Novice Fortify Novice Level Destruction Spells.
…..Wow…..this made my brain melt.
I'm going to think that every time a see one now.
Days since the last grammatical error: 0
Or Xzibit.
Here's an idea: instead of taking an arrow in (yes, in) the knee, we make them take a giant club to the FUCKING FACE. That'll teach them to make memes out of meme-worthy quotes!
Why, Alpar?! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?
Also I'm not sure, but shouldn't the comma go before written?
One small step for Giant, one giant leap for Dovahkiin. Literally.
The alternate answer is that we're just unable to tell the difference between males and females due to them not having the same secondary characteristics as us, but of course, as they say on the TES lore forums, that's Boring and Therefore Wrong.
Who's game for some medieval era spontaneous generation doctrine? Giants come from mammoth cheese. Mudcrabs come from silt. Skeevers come from spider webs. Frostbite Spiders come from tree roots. Children come from convenient backstories.
somehow, I've missed that type of poisoned poison, definitely would help with my ebony armor which has that do poison damage to anything that gets close effect. on a note unrelated to my statement but relevant to your picture HAHAHAHA!!! Oh GOD my side hurts!
sorta like dwarves from lord of the rings, well if Gimli was being serious
they don't seem to speak too softly though, do they
I actually had to double check the name to be sure before I laughed at that one, but jeez, this was a good one
well like shawn said, it's not very friendly, but the glitches it's megaton hyper club has certainly are funny, so big Funny giant?
the horror…
if he says we need to go deeper you may still want to have a different adult on hand
Hence the "Playing Skyrim while drunk" part. He was wasted when he came up with this, I agree with it because it's hilarious.
Thank you for not posting whizzpopper jokes.
My gunnerkrigg image gets up to 10….then goes down to 7….And here I thought there were more GKC fans in Halolz than there apparently is :(
<img src="http://s3.amazonaws.com/kym-assets/photos/images/original/000/173/056/1776140_o.gif?1315793980" /img>
Butt
Fucking
Gravity
Dat awkwardly placed skull.
I like his answer better, too.
1. Take club to the face
2. Die
3. "I must go, my people need me."
I want to say yes….but don't quote me 100%….
Oh hush, I was multitasking at the time. Either that or I just derped up hard on my own.
I will now go commit seppuku to preserve my honor.
*DESPERATELY SCAMPERS FOR OLD TORN COPY OF BFG*
*SOUND OF PAGES FLIPPING AND PUNS FORMING*
And thus, air travel was born. Please secure lighter items in the storage bins above you, and heavier items under the corpse in front of you.
If we get much deeper we're going to need a proctologist.
This could not possibly be more brilliant.
And so, Shawn opened his heart and let a classic Novel come into the ranks of Halolz.
But then he realized it was kinda stupid so he made a Skyrim version
No, don't! We've already had too much death to preserve grammar! Have you forgotten about Berserker?!
Also, gotta love how people thumbs-up a comment about killing yourself.
More reason to go kill myself!
It was nice knowing you guys, I'll see you all again at therapy!
I'd say "I need an adult", but he is one, and he's got a medical license too, seems fine to me.
Damn. Some one beat me to actually making a picture based on Fus Ro Dah sounding like Fus Roald Dahl. If only I had thought to use Tiid Klo Ul. -_-
Medics do it from behind… so yeah.