Who Needs HM's?

What are those little trees made out of anyway? Something so tough you need to use specifically designed software to teach your team to cut it down!
By Epifex

Blog Widget by LinkWithin

Posted by Shawn Handyside on May 15, 2013 · 7:59 AM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (237 votes, average: 4.59 out of 5)
Loading ... Loading ...
Artistic, Highly Illogical Captain, Irony, Nintendo, Pokémon, Sequential Art, Special Attacks, The Great Outdoors, Things Are Heating Up

· Leave a comment (180 Comments)


180 Responses to “Who Needs HM’s?”

  1. wolfpax181 on May 15th, 2013 8:18 am

    A new post! Gotta think of something witty people will like!

    Fire is hot and trees burn!


  2. CapnJakeBob on May 15th, 2013 8:23 am

    It's a test from the gods. Only those worthy of removing the tree from its roots is able to pass.

  3. Junocis on May 15th, 2013 8:26 am

    Well that escalated quickly…..

  4. Cyndaquazy on May 15th, 2013 9:11 am

    Anyone consider just stepping OVER the little fella? It seems like it wouldn't be that big of a challenge…

  5. Happy on May 15th, 2013 10:09 am

    In the beginning Arceus created the heavens and the earth, and the waters and beasts of both the sea and land and he made humans too. But lo, did he find these humans were a pain in the arse; they captured all his creatures and forced them to cockfight, and although he laughed a little at the term they used for it, he was enraged by their cruelty and hubris.
    And so he said, "Let there be a Small Shrubbery, that doth appear inconveniently in humanity's pathways; let this tree, in spite of its mass, blockade their progress; and let it be destructible by neither Man, nor My creatures he believes he can rightfully enslave, but by a single method that may only be attained in a long and convoluted manner. Let it be the bane of their society, as their metropolises sprawl across the land, and as they advance in every area of knowledge, from hunting to arts to medicine… this one answer will forever be lost to them: How To Rid Of This Shrubbery Without Resorting To One Useless HM."

    And Arceus looked at his work, and it was good. And then he rested. And then he thought he'd make Zubat, too. But afterwards even he felt that was a little much.

  6. Limelight on May 15th, 2013 10:10 am
  7. sims796 on May 15th, 2013 11:19 am

    Goddammit Blaziken! Your aim sucks! I mean, Flamethrower has a 95% accuracy! What the #@%$!

  8. Duraigo on May 15th, 2013 12:06 pm

    Looks like Blazikens strength just can't cut it this time.

  9. Comire on May 15th, 2013 12:32 pm

    Was this not on Halolz already? Huh, right.

  10. Teleporting Rock on May 15th, 2013 12:42 pm

    I feel the same way about Rock Smash and Whirlpool…

  11. Vabolo on May 15th, 2013 12:56 pm

    The only alternative to using HM01 is to cut the impenetrable shrubbery…

    <img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc90bxN7gl1qj1v1yo1_500.gif&quot; width="413" img="">

  12. Hyze on May 15th, 2013 1:01 pm

    So I just realized something.

    The Celadon gym requires you to cut down a bush to get in, correct? You need both the HM and the proper gym badge in order to do that.

    That means that anyone who works at the Celadon gym has at least defeated Misty (which makes sense because they're using grass Pokemon), but it could imply that each trainer at Celadon started out on their own Pokemon journey at some point and stopped after 3 gyms. So why did they stop? What made Celadon so special?

    Then it makes sense. The women, the plants The whole gym is a lotus eater machine!

    And we thought Sabrina's Gym from the anime was messed up.

  13. Vabolo on May 15th, 2013 1:05 pm

    Hey, you know what this thread also needs? A POTENTIAL FOR RELIGIOUS FLAMEWAR!
    <img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljq2jlS7QI1qci4ejo1_500.gif&quot; width="413" img="">

  14. MasterLuigi452 on May 15th, 2013 2:06 pm

    That tree can solo Elite 4.

  15. VyseRogueKing on May 15th, 2013 3:05 pm

    Life always finds a way.

    To make yours a living hell.

  16. Cookino on May 15th, 2013 4:54 pm

    Well, I guess he just wasn't cut out for the job.

  17. Kn0w1d3a on May 15th, 2013 5:22 pm

    "we meet AGAIN,"
    What did you do the first time?

  18. Cubia on May 15th, 2013 6:01 pm
  19. Nick Soapdish on May 15th, 2013 10:34 pm

    I wish this tree was emo so it would cut itself.

  20. Sonicsmash2 on May 16th, 2013 12:24 am

    "Nobody teaches their starter cut"
    erk-eheh…..yeah…..nobody……"New game"

  21. dope92 on May 16th, 2013 1:29 am

    [youtube t-EZRHI_nu8 rel="nofollow"> youtube]

    im done for today

  22. HughbertReturns on May 16th, 2013 7:11 am

    Alternatively, use Feraligator and blast it with hydro-pump continuously
    "Yeah, no such thing as too much of a good thing huh? HUH?!"
    To which the tree replies: *blub*

  23. Alpar on May 21st, 2013 2:02 am

    …uhh… am I the only one not seeing new subsmissions or…

  24. Prof. Luigi on May 21st, 2013 10:01 pm

    I cannot comprehend what is going on in this picture.

  25. HughbertReturns on May 22nd, 2013 11:31 am

    Eks Bahks Juan
    Where are the jokes Shawn?

  26. Vabolo on May 22nd, 2013 2:40 pm

    While the site's runnin' dry, feast yer eyes on this neat little cinematic you probably already saw before!
    [youtube 0jNT5cMwxw0 rel="nofollow"> youtube]

  27. SpectralSheep on May 22nd, 2013 9:14 pm

    Did Trunks forget to wake Shawn up from cryo again? Figures…

  28. Leo E. on May 24th, 2013 11:49 am

    No new updates…


  29. SpectralSheep on May 25th, 2013 4:33 pm

    NEW F*uckin*G GUILTY GEAR.
    [youtube NKGPhKu3jNg rel="nofollow"> youtube]

  30. Soul Eater 676 on May 25th, 2013 7:46 pm

    Mean while, in the Fanfiction world of well anything.
    <img src="http://fc04.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2013/145/4/6/progress_by_souleater676-d66jwxj.jpg&quot; width="400/">
    "Views reached 400 in one day"

    <img src="http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/126331/m-bison-yes-o.gif"&gt;

    Thanks for all the support from all factions.

  31. ChaoPLS on May 26th, 2013 11:46 pm

    Anyone else notice that patch on Blaziken's crotch? Questionable.

  32. Alpar on May 27th, 2013 1:07 pm

    Okay so since it seems Shawn's abandoned us I'm making a Skype group for all the Halolz users that still go on here (not including some people like some of the oldies) and I already have Soul, Happy, Porecomesis, and a few others. If you want to get this thing started since now Halolz is dead, just add me at:


    and lemme know you're a Halolz user.

  33. vidiotdragon on May 27th, 2013 11:47 pm


  34. Randolph Magic Key on May 28th, 2013 6:53 pm

    Who needs HM's?
    More like "Who needs new submissions?"
    Right, guys? Right? Huh?

  35. Icesickle97 on May 28th, 2013 8:34 pm

    I see I haven't missed much in my 3 week absence. Or more. I've even lost track.
    But I have a reason! It's been a good couple months since I got a new game, so I got 3: Vanquish, Metal Gear Hack-n'-Slash, and Bioshock Infinite.
    Oh God the good times.
    I can still feel the rush of powderizing cyborgs.
    Edit: And apparently I'm still 3 hours further into the future than I knew.
    Good. That's still there. It's comforting in some strange way.

  36. Soul Eater 676 on May 30th, 2013 11:13 pm


  37. Prof. Luigi on May 31st, 2013 6:00 am

    Great. Shawn Handyside has gone missing again.
    Alright, who's up for forming a search party to go look for him?

  38. Paulrus-Keaton? on May 31st, 2013 10:24 pm

    Okay, if it hasn't been established already, Shawn is at the cons doing his thing; hawking his wares and promoting his sites and all that. This has been the case for weeks and my sources tell me that he's going to another this coming weekend so it may be a bit longer before we see something new; after that I don't know.

    Obviously I think Shawn should have given us a heads up or found a way to keep content flowing, even though the past year has been kinda slow. Having an idea on how clusterfucked Shawn's work schedule must be I believe that if he wants to keep this site going, it needs a new way to manage content--appointing Trunks, more automation, shit like that.

    Otherwise I imagine a loss in visitors and some of you breaking into post-apocalyptic tribes, fighting each other over forums and Wolf jokes.

  39. VyseRogueKing on June 3rd, 2013 1:27 am

    Oh hey there don't mind me. Just bringin' in some sweet sweet harmonica to blues up this empty joint. Now if someone could pick up some tumbleweeds and roll 'em on by we'll be set.
    [youtube 5NHF2x1uKRM rel="nofollow"> youtube]

  40. Zyquux on June 3rd, 2013 2:43 am

    In the absence of new posts, have " rel="nofollow">this.

    Edit: I can't be bothered with figuring out embedding.

  41. Scept on June 3rd, 2013 3:41 am

    Week 3 of the Halolz drought.

    We believe Trunks and Shawn to be dead. Doesn't look like we'll be getting anything new anytime soon, since nobody around here has a f[BLEEP]ing clue how to appoint new admins. We soon resorted to cannibalism. Alpar went first.

  42. SpaghettiWeegee on June 3rd, 2013 10:00 am

    Uh oh! I sure hope these last tree weeks with no posts doesn't mean Shawn was… Fired!

    Maybe he's just bushed from all the conventions he's been visiting!

    All I can say is, cut it out. I'll bring Farfetch'd next time, I promise.

  43. MasqueNoMercy on June 3rd, 2013 1:48 pm

    either the people who post are having issues right now, or video games just arent funny anymore…

    i blame all of you who play call of duty for this

Feel free to leave a comment...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!