Gaaaah! Filthy humans… filled with organs!

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Posted by Shawn Handyside on October 25, 2008 · 1:55 PM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (160 votes, average: 3.68 out of 5)
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Disturbing, Extreme CloseUp, F-Zero, Nintendo, No Caption Needed, Super Smash Bros, Weird, Wii

· Leave a comment (44 Comments)


44 Responses to “FALCON… X-RAY?”

  1. PoisonTaco on October 25th, 2008 1:59 pm


    Also… wtf is that?

  2. grunt_killer on October 25th, 2008 2:00 pm

    lol why he got eyes and no1 cares if ur first or not

  3. Soggywafflz on October 25th, 2008 2:01 pm

    Extreme close up of Cpt. falcon’s face. nothin special and no caption

  4. Shawn Handyside on October 25th, 2008 2:02 pm

    @grunt_killer I was kind of wondering that myself… why did they bother to give Falcon modeled eyes when he never takes his helmet off?

  5. Ravage on October 25th, 2008 2:08 pm

    Now that’s scary. *shudder*

  6. rikumelenium on October 25th, 2008 2:17 pm

    @shawn and grunt_killer
    it looks like he has eye lids, so it’s probably just there so that if you accidentally get a camera angle showing underneath his helmet, it would show that he’s not some crazy terminator cyborg thing lol

  7. ManiacalZManiac on October 25th, 2008 2:35 pm

    @ Shawn
    Actually, They Only Gave Falcon ONE EYE. Dunno Why, But They Did.

  8. gunkitsune on October 25th, 2008 3:18 pm


  9. sosij-man on October 25th, 2008 3:23 pm

    he’s STILL sexy!

  10. Chris on October 25th, 2008 4:13 pm

    Qu’est-ce que le fuck?

  11. kurisu7885 on October 25th, 2008 4:22 pm

    Anyone else notice the lack of a brain?

  12. Glitch on October 25th, 2008 4:40 pm


  13. Blue-Chameleon on October 25th, 2008 5:36 pm

    They gave him an eye so he could see when you SHOW HIM YA MOVES

  14. lien on October 25th, 2008 5:38 pm

    I am Sinistar!
    I hunger!
    Run Run!
    I hunger Coward!

  15. Boreas on October 25th, 2008 6:13 pm

    He looks sorta like Andross from Starfox N64…

    Show me your insides?

  16. The Architect on October 25th, 2008 6:16 pm


  17. piclemaniscool on October 25th, 2008 7:02 pm

    @ Chris

    I don’t know, CAN YOU?!
    (for non speaking french ppl use google translator)
    [(i hope i get money for accidentally making a google ad :D)]

    What everyone lacks to mention is that he also has teeth-scratch that-DENTURES! his lips are sewn shut, and he can say “show me yo moves!” without a tongue & nothing but dentures?! WTF?!

    For shame Nintendo… making a character with no upper-face have (a) POORLY made eyeball, and dentures to a character with nothing past bumps & shading for lips. if captain falcon were here today…

    well… if he WERE here today i’d ask him which way to the brawl universe so i could see mario, Sonic, and most importantly… R.O.B.!!!!11!!0!Q!!

    Wait, what were we talking about again?
    oh yeah, uh… 3/5 cuz no real joke or caption.

  18. KidWithTheFace on October 25th, 2008 7:05 pm

    that eye….is surprisingly well textured for something you never see…

  19. KidWithTheFace on October 25th, 2008 7:17 pm

    i hate to be the jerk that double posts…but i have been working on a 3-D human face set-up all day and all yesterday, and i can’t let this one go.

    you only ever need to model/texture/rig what your audience is ever going to see. no one is ever going to see the inside of captian falcon’s mouth, so denture teeth are acceptable. also, the crappy eye is acceptable, particularly in the back where poly count shoots down, as no one is ever going to see the eye, or at least the back of the eye. if you ask me, nintendo did too much work here, which makes me a little sad, but it’s good to see the effort? also, those lips look modeled out to me, at least the bottom one.

    i would also ask the good captian the way the brawl universe, so i could punch link in the face. but until then, i can only dream…

  20. X Intolerable X on October 25th, 2008 7:32 pm

    LOL @ kurisu7885

  21. G1drake on October 25th, 2008 7:41 pm


  22. Runeblade on October 25th, 2008 7:45 pm


    Clearly his face was fully modeled so when Nintendo announces the first SSBB patch, they don’t have to worry about remodeling:

    “Captain Falcon’s final smash has been changed to “Epic Falcon Punch” in which he jumps out of his racer and Falcon Punches his opponent with such force that his helmet flies off. Yes, ladies, he’s single. Oh, and he speaks with a japanese accent for some reason here.”

  23. Pigeon Army on October 25th, 2008 8:05 pm



  24. Chris on October 25th, 2008 8:22 pm


    Google translator is about as accurate as a bus timetable.

  25. lolguy on October 25th, 2008 9:39 pm

    Qu’est-ce que le hell?

  26. Rayza B on October 25th, 2008 10:30 pm

    But it does give the general idea like a bus timetable

  27. Godfather2574 on October 25th, 2008 11:51 pm

    His eye kinda looks like snakes.

  28. Happy on October 26th, 2008 6:06 am

    From what I know, “qu’est-ce que c’est en Francais” is “what is it [spoken] in French”, so I’m gonna assume “qu’est-ce que le fuck” means…

    And in other news, this picture is made of win and awesome. ILU, half-assed perfectionist Nintendo modellers.

  29. luckydog on October 26th, 2008 8:56 am

    KidWiththeface is correct. There is no need to model thing you’re not going to see. All that would do is make the game lag. In fact, they shouldn’t have even modeled the back of the eye as you’ll never see it. Can you imagine was a pain in the arse it would be to make and model and then try to model the inside on the off chance that something as messed up as this would happen?
    Normal modeling is a pain as it is. If anything it shows how dedicated they are.

  30. Chris on October 26th, 2008 12:45 pm

    @ Rayza B,

    Uh…yeah, way to over-analyze the joke.

    To everybody replying to me, my French is crap so what you remember from your high school French classes is probably right -- it’s just that I don’t care that much, and I’m astounded that you guys seem to.

  31. SprodeMaster on October 26th, 2008 12:48 pm

    Someone call Wikipedia, we now know his eye color! :D

  32. DETH2GERBILZ on October 26th, 2008 2:53 pm



  33. Hirofox on October 26th, 2008 2:54 pm


    It’s there for us fans with no lives and Action Replay to find. Simple as that.

  34. TheDJ17 on October 26th, 2008 8:50 pm

    The Cap’n needs a tooth brush.

  35. Louie on October 26th, 2008 9:31 pm

    If you made an Invader Zim Reference in that little comment under the picture

    I love you and this website

  36. 1dayayear on October 26th, 2008 10:23 pm

    Looks like jigsaw tortured yet another victim to “the falcon tape”

  37. Commanderwill5 on October 27th, 2008 3:20 am

    They actually bothered to model out an eyeball and set of teeth?

  38. Beau on October 27th, 2008 8:09 am


  39. Fenix on October 29th, 2008 10:55 pm

    I think the Reason why they put the eyeballs in is because there are Little White triangles on his Eyes in Game, and I do believe they will Close and move occasionally. But to me, thats Just weird.

  40. Eight-Ball on October 30th, 2008 7:01 pm

    @ Louie
    I think he did.
    Oh, and have you met my friend Pastulio?

  41. Stick on October 31st, 2008 9:15 pm


    wow cant believe noone thought about that line yet O_o

  42. Alfa on March 23rd, 2009 8:41 pm

    no moneys to make a second one O.o'

  43. Chaoscntrl on September 27th, 2009 2:43 am

    Wow, Gross, but eye opening as well. I can't believe Nintendo put this much detail in Brawl, they even Individually modeled his EYES! you can't even SEE his eyes, Good Job Nintendo, good job.

  44. uzumakiclan43 on May 28th, 2010 3:43 am

    Salvador Dali be damned!

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