And last time it was only even vaguely Wolf-centric.

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Posted by Fred "Trunks" Wood on October 14, 2015 · 2:01 PM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (8 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
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Can't Let You Do That, StarFox

· Leave a comment (41 Comments)



  1. CodePhoenix525 on October 14th, 2015 4:15 pm

    Halolz has become a shell of its former self. It hurts seeing it in this state. It just isn't bringing out the "lolz" like it used to. Maybe I grew up and changed my overall humor… or maybe I just don't really know what humor is anymore. All I know is that this site isn't as good as it used to be…

  2. Scept on October 14th, 2015 4:52 pm

    And with the return of Wolf Wednesday, the cycle is complete. Halolz can rest in peace.

  3. Cloak on October 14th, 2015 4:59 pm
  4. MexicanJuice on October 15th, 2015 8:09 am


  5. NoCluePythons19 on October 15th, 2015 5:00 pm

    With Falcon and Wolf having returned, do we dare to dream?

  6. Leo E. on October 16th, 2015 11:52 am

    Shut up Wolf, you're not even in Smash anymore.
    How does it feel to be worth less than Mii Fighters, the Koopalings, and goddamn male Wii Fit Trainer.

  7. Rocker23220 on October 16th, 2015 1:23 pm

    (This may be my most thought-out post ever, hope you guys enjoy)

    <img src="http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Wheel_2a18f0_1386570.jpg&quot; width="400" height="300">
    Yakko: "Wheel of Morality, turn, turn, turn! Tell us the lesson that we should learn!

    <img src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/w_u05kUx1WQ/hqdefault.jpg&quot; width="400" height="300">
    Yakko: "Moral Number 3!"

    <img src="http://i113.photobucket.com/albums/n230/rocker23220/wheel of morality.png" width="400" height="300">
    Yakko: "And the moral of today's story is…"

    <img src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/30/04/50/300450e5d515c7f49446b029af9ec00a.jpg&quot; width="400" height="300">
    Yakko: "Don't believe the hype that after one or two new posts Halolz is finally coming back to it's former glory"

    <img src="http://media.tumblr.com/a5c024071f1403d941227dd14a42df44/tumblr_inline_mq08gwrYrU1qz4rgp.png&quot; width="400" height="300">
    Dot: "But why not??? Don't Trunks and Shawn love us anymore?"
    Wakko: "I don't know, Trunks, maybe? But Shawn???……."

    <img src="http://i113.photobucket.com/albums/n230/rocker23220/wheel 2.png" width="400" height="300">
    Yakko, Wakko, Dot: "YIPE!!!"

    <img src="http://i113.photobucket.com/albums/n230/rocker23220/wheel 3.png" width="400" height="300">
    *outro music*

  8. MasterLuigi452 on October 19th, 2015 5:51 pm

    And thus, it begins a new…

  9. wolfpax181 on November 1st, 2015 8:47 pm

    And we're dead again.

    Ah well, see you on Luigi's TF2 server if you ever play there.

  10. Leo E. on November 16th, 2015 9:21 am

    So I thought I would fill the time until the next update with more yuri pictures, but then I thought, why not do something a little more productive with my time?

    I quickly decided against that. So here's a review of a yuri anime.

    <img src="http://40.media.tumblr.com/82629aaa46c009d2f1546a8446848cea/tumblr_inline_nxwu2iZ7cF1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; height="231" width="480">

    Strawberry Panic (usually stylized as “Strawberry Panic!” but like fuck am I gonna put the exclamation mark every time I say it) is a yuri anime series by Studio Madhouse based on the manga based on the light novels by Sakurako Kimino, a novelist who would later continue her gay exploits with the immensely-popular and marginally-less-gay Love Live! Series (Kimino seems to have a thing for exclamation marks). Yes, I said less gay. Nozomi and Eri may be going down on each other every time they go out for parfaits, but they’ve never done half the shit that Strawberry Panic’s girls have done on-screen.

    <img src="http://41.media.tumblr.com/25f4c3dd92dbcc18495febb1b8fd4bdf/tumblr_inline_nxwu44m1wc1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; height="267" width="480">
    Love Live’s Umi Sonoda watching Strawberry Panic.

    Though mostly focusing on a pair of characters named Nagisa and Shizuma, Strawberry Panic encompasses the stories of a dozen or so girls, each gayer than the one before them as long as you put Shizuma last. They all attend a loosely-affiliated trio of schools on Astraea Hill that share the same campus and housing, and therefore get to be uniform-coded to help you remember them better. By name, the schools are Miator, Spica, and Lulim.

    Miator is the school of main characters. Series focal points Nagisa Aoi and Shizuma Hanazono both attend Miator, as well as Nagisa’s totally platonic roommate Tamao Suzumi, Shizuma’s booty call Miyuki Rokujou, and the easily-forgettable kouhai Chiyo Tsukidate. When elections are held for the “etoile” position (basically lesbian prom queen but for the whole year), Miator’s candidates’ win percentages hover somewhere around 100%. To put it bluntly, they’re so important that their school motto is “If it ain’t happening here, it’s a sub-plot.”

    <img src="http://41.media.tumblr.com/ed3a36af0c2d6cc9b3c5fcf866d89c17/tumblr_inline_nxwu5qq8ld1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; height="720" width="480">
    “You’re in my house now, Nagisa.”

    Spica is the school of stuck-up bitches. They have a lovely choir that is also full of stuck-up bitches. Breaking through the crowd of stuck-up bitches are delicate flower Hikari Konohana (RIP Miyu Matsuki) and lovable delinquent Yaya Nanto, who both not-so-coincidentally happen to be members of said choir. Oh and there’s also Amane Ootori who is boring as fuck. Spica’s student council president Shion Toumori also gets some screen time here and there to try and steal the next Etoile election from Miator, but aside from that she doesn’t really do much. Also hailing from Spica is the shitty tsundere Tsubumi Okuwaka. And let’s not forget the two worst bitches in the world Kaname Kenjou and Momomi Kiyashiki. Did I mention that they are the two worst people alive? Because it comes up. A lot.

    <img src="http://40.media.tumblr.com/dac964a85e79b9ef20bdeb2bafa27b57/tumblr_inline_nxwu6jzGG71r7qk9c_500.jpg"&gt;
    What a lovely couple Yaya and Hikari make. I’m sure there’s nothing but happy days ahead for them.

    Lulim is the proud comic relief school. They’re unimportant, but they know it, and they thrive on it. Taking center stage here is Chikaru Minamoto, along with her two underlings Kizuna Hyuuga and Remon Natsume. Another girl named Kagome Byakudan also attends Lulim, and serves to fill the show’s creepy child quota. The first three spend 90% of the series running around in the background doing crazy things and being useless, and the other 10% of the time having threesomes together. Chikaru spends any free time being Yuri Santa Claus, often working behind the scenes to hook up other couples.

    <img src="http://40.media.tumblr.com/23cc3184ae1d180daf56df6f785b18a5/tumblr_inline_nxwu8byl9v1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; height="356" width="480">
    Imagine Hitch, but gayer and without a Y chromosome.

  11. TheRealKirby on November 25th, 2015 10:47 am

    Oh what a lovely day, what a lovely day indeed in the Halolz Comments section!
    We shall continue to post so that Fred Trunks can witness us and send us to the gates of the old Glory Days!
    Witness, witness my comment!

  12. MasterLuigi452 on December 1st, 2015 4:48 am

    Pack up your suitcase again boys.
    The place is dead again.

  13. Leo E. on December 1st, 2015 10:23 am

    What's that, kids? It's next month and still no update? Then get ready for another wonderful yuri anime review!

    <img src="http://41.media.tumblr.com/80c99b097f32244fd059b28cdde9594d/tumblr_inline_nyoq3vr0dG1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; width="480" height="270">

    Yuri Kuma Arashi (literally “Lily Bear Storm” in Japanese, but you should know that yuri means gay girls) is an anime series from the delightfully impenetrable mind of Kunihiko Ikuhara, who you may remember from Revolutionary Girl Utena, Mawaru Penguindrum, and the more fucked up episodes of Sailor Moon. If you don’t remember him, you’ll be thoroughly reminded throughout the series, because it has nearly all of his trademark direction choices.

    <img src="http://41.media.tumblr.com/25467de093c7d2e35d66954703c577dc/tumblr_inline_nyoph3nuwX1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; height="360" width="480">
    Remember these two?

    At its base, Yurikuma is perhaps one of the strangest premises for an anime. To put it bluntly in a run-on sentence, it’s about bears who eat humans, so the humans walled off the bears behind a “Severance Barrier” (which seems to do almost nothing to keep any particularly persistent bear out), and also the bears can take the form of girls and are lesbians, and the context is so incredibly sexual that for a bit you might actually wonder what exactly they mean by “eat”. I should clarify that they do in fact mean the gnashing teeth and the blood and guts and through the mouth into the stomach.

    What tends to throw most people off from Yurikuma in the first place is the aforementioned overtly sexual presentation, as it’s not exactly the kind of show you’d be comfortable watching with people in the room. Combine that with its hard-to-describe premise and you’re looking at a show that you can praise constantly for months with absolutely nobody wanting to believe you. But that’s exactly what I’m going to try and do here, because holy fucking shit is this show good.

    <img src="http://40.media.tumblr.com/96253e4372a5cb3bacbd7a485ede8d86/tumblr_inline_nyopiedqqM1r7qk9c_500.jpg&quot; height="270" width="480">
    This is a little difficult to explain to an onlooker.

    So our story focuses on Kureha Tsubaki (note that her last name has to do with flowers and also has the syllables for ‘moon’ in there as well), a high school girl whose mother was eaten by bears in the past. Naturally she has more than a little animosity toward bears, to the point where she practices daily with a hunting rifle on bear-shaped targets in preparation for the day she meets one.

    Well that day has come. Two bears named Ginko Yurishiro (note that Ginko’s name is very similar to the ginkgo tree) and Lulu Yurigasaki take human form and join Kureha’s school with their sights set on Kureha. Though initially they seem to want to eat Kureha, it quickly becomes clear that Ginko wants to do far more than just that to her.

    <img src="http://36.media.tumblr.com/ba142bc6cac5e4c9fa904786b9242ccc/tumblr_inline_nyopkd6NIx1r7qk9c_500.png&quot; height="270" width="480">
    Disgusting hand-holding, for starters.

    Also starring for a whole ten minutes is Sumika Izumino, Kureha’s gentle-hearted bespectacled girlfriend. She is introduced just long enough to show that she and Kureha are in love, before she is promptly killed and devoured by bears, presumed to be Ginko and Lulu. But since this is an Ikuhara anime, the fact that she’s is dead in no way means she’s out of the story. Numerous flashbacks continue to flesh out her character and her influence on the events of the story, many of which consist of her and Kureha naked in the latter’s bed together.

    <img src="http://41.media.tumblr.com/b3679df866eb693732f43c2e0e7b54f1/tumblr_inline_nyopktjNao1r7qk9c_500.png&quot; height="270" width="480">
    Just girly things.

  14. MasterLuigi452 on December 18th, 2015 4:18 am

    Huh. We lost the domain for some time. How was everybody?

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