MAKE MILLIONS OF DOLLARS AND FANS, NEVER WRITE YOUR OWN MUSIC

Rock Band. It simulates everything about the experience of having your own band! …Except of course for the part where you actually make music.
By Jesse S.

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Posted by Shawn Handyside on February 16, 2011 · 12:38 AM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (199 votes, average: 4.20 out of 5)
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Categories:
Advice Meme, Electronic Arts, Guitar Hero/Rock Band, Harmonix, Irony

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105 Responses to “MAKE MILLIONS OF DOLLARS AND FANS…”

  1. Lax on February 16th, 2011 12:41 am

    Yeah, I know, Rockband is just as embarrassing as DDR,, thinking you can actually do it…

  2. AuraMaster on February 16th, 2011 12:45 am

    Play on plastic instruments.

    Become international rock stars.

  3. AuraMaster on February 16th, 2011 12:47 am

    Halolz: Your premier source to advice memes the editor thinks are funny.

  4. Red on February 16th, 2011 12:49 am

    I come up with my own lyrics… just to existing music:
    Case-&-point example (actually from the previous post) [had some "help" in a way]:
    "Come Surf Away"

    I'm surfing away,
    set an open course, for Route 19.
    'Cos I've got to catch Horsea
    So I'll have a chance, with that chick, Misty

    Round here, I'm the master/trainer
    so come along,
    we'll search [for] Cinnabar Island, [on] it's eastern shore[s]
    And I'll try, o' Arceus, I'll try,
    To catch, them all!

    I look to Route 19/20
    The Swimmers in the waves, "Spark" my memories
    Some happy, some sad
    No riding bikes indoors, and Team Rocket's mad///hey, where's my dad **you decide which**

    This is child labor
    I should have been paid
    But somehow I missed out on the [pot of] Pokedollars///prize money
    But I'll try best that I can…

    TO CAAAATCH THEM ALL!!

    A gathering of Clefairy/Clefable appeared above my head
    They gave to me a Moon Stone, and/then danced around and said;

    They said, "Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me Youngster
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me,
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me, Camper/Beauty/Lass
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with MMMEEEEE"

    I thought that they were Celebi, but to my surprise
    I [Rock] Climbed atop their Mountain, and stood there in the skies (for 3 years)

    Singing, come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me, Gambler
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me, [Bug Catcher]
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me

    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me, [Gym] Leaders
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me [Hiker]
    Come surf away, come surf away, come surf away with me…

    come to think of it… that's not writing my own music… that's [technically] poetry

  5. Silverblade123 on February 16th, 2011 12:49 am

    Skip Encore

    Fail Show

  6. TheUnknownNoob on February 16th, 2011 12:58 am

    >Have website where everyone hates advice memes and bitches about them endlessly.

    >Post advice memes

  7. MorningMoon on February 16th, 2011 1:20 am

    This advice is so boring i cannot even think of something amusing to mock it, so i'll just throw this:
    Shawn start posting funnies!

  8. Jet_Sparrow on February 16th, 2011 1:27 am

    Slightly tilt fake guitar.

    HOLY SHIT LIGHTNING BOLTS

  9. RemielChibus on February 16th, 2011 1:56 am

    Sing no words to E-Pro.

    Still become a superstar.

  10. DM1293 on February 16th, 2011 1:59 am

    In other news, Guitar Hero is out of the business of making people follow the rhythm of multicolored notes.

    People, in the panic of hearing such an announcement, have looked for alternatives to fill in the gap. Eye-witness reports have verified that they have filled it in with an object made out of this material called "wood", using instead of one flipper and five multicolored frets, uses about 20 or so of these frets and you change notes by pressing down on these "strings", made either out of nylon or steel.

    Nickelback is on record saying "we're F***ING doomed now, because the talent pool has just skyrocketed."

  11. Segashinobidude on February 16th, 2011 2:07 am

    The Exact same thing about this could be said for "GLEE"

  12. Alpar on February 16th, 2011 6:42 am

    Shawn posts advice meme submission

    Everyone posts advice meme comments

  13. tmotom on February 16th, 2011 7:56 am

    This is actually really funny. Because as I have played all of the Rock Bands, I now notice that this is Hilarious. Like how you can have a female singer sing something like Death Metal whereas Females do not normally sing Death Metal. Hilarious.

  14. Dr. Furry on February 16th, 2011 9:25 am

    rockband is for scenesters, real men played guitar hero until world tour came out, then they went back to whatever else.

  15. _Twitch_ on February 16th, 2011 10:58 am

    Activision:
    we do what we probably shouldn't, because we can.

  16. Strike_low on February 16th, 2011 1:06 pm

    Play any song where the original vocalist is a woman
    Let a man sing it

  17. C__F on February 16th, 2011 3:09 pm

    Actually, the ??? should be between "Sign a Record Deal" and "Profit!"

    Because no one knows exactly how one leads to the other. It's a mystery.

  18. BTSnoogans on February 16th, 2011 6:01 pm

    This is also true for the various pop musicians of the '90s. And now, actually.

  19. sinneblade on February 18th, 2011 3:08 pm

    Actually, you're kind of forgetting rock band network a little bit here :P

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