KILL ALIENS WITH GUNS, NEVER DO ANY ACTUAL SCIENCE

He’s been playing the hero so long, even he can’t remember what his degree is in!
By Oboewan

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Posted by Shawn Handyside on December 13, 2010 · 11:12 PM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (299 votes, average: 4.57 out of 5)
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Categories:
Advice Meme, Half-Life, Irony, PC, Playstation, Science/Math, Valve Software, Xbox 360

· Leave a comment (107 Comments)





 

107 Responses to “KILL ALIENS WITH GUNS”

  1. =o on December 13th, 2010 11:20 pm

    penis cake

  2. Tobikun on December 13th, 2010 11:28 pm

    Gordan Freeman never did science…….EVERYTHING I KNOW IS A LIE!!!!

  3. GameboyPATH on December 13th, 2010 11:33 pm

    An object in motion… *crowbars a Combine* …stays in motion.

  4. AquaLink on December 13th, 2010 11:41 pm

    he did too! he pushed that lawn mower into a lightning bolt. it's totally science and physics.
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  5. TCC on December 13th, 2010 11:42 pm

    killing aliens isn't science?

  6. Fission on December 13th, 2010 11:42 pm

    Photoshop head of character on a multi-colored background

    Think it's funny

  7. Trogador on December 13th, 2010 11:43 pm

    "Hey great work Gordon, throwin' that switch an all. I can see your MIT education really pays for itself"

    God I love Barney.

  8. tveye on December 13th, 2010 11:49 pm
  9. ZegenRuki on December 13th, 2010 11:58 pm

    Gordon Freeman has a PhD in Physics. That's why he needs to do basic physics puzzles to progress.

    Yep, his MIT education really made him go places… In more ways than one.

  10. OrionX on December 14th, 2010 12:00 am

    "Hm…let's see. If I place this 5 kg boulder on one end of this 20 m plank, while the fulcrum is adjusted 0.45 m from its center of mass, the additional amount of mass I would need to counterbalance my own weight such that I don't tip the scale would be…"

    "Ah, screw it."
    *piles on everything in the immediate area on one end*

  11. Ragnellrok on December 14th, 2010 12:19 am

    Well there's a reason for that. If you kill all the aliens you can steal their research materials, and viola! You then advance civilization and you are a hero and a scientist and a political figurehead to boot!

  12. Judgment on December 14th, 2010 12:25 am

    Become a scientist with an MIT education
    Realize killing aliens is a better and more exciting career choice

  13. Lordshadow on December 14th, 2010 12:46 am

    One should know that there is a massive difference between "science" and "SCIENCE!"
    "Science" involves carefully contemplated experiments with controlled variables and whatnot.
    "SCIENCE!" involves hitting aliens in the face with crowbars while throwing explosive containers at them with a gravity gun.

    Gordon Freeman has his PHD in SCIENCE!, not science.

  14. shadow649 on December 14th, 2010 12:48 am

    If god had wanted aliens to live he would have made Gordon Freeman do science. And maybe talk.

  15. FoxyMayo on December 14th, 2010 1:14 am

    It's kind of hard to do science whenever all hell breaks loose, ya know? Can't crunch all them numbers or play with hazardous materials whenever some alien, indigenous territorial species, metro-cop, or marine is trying to create a brand new hole in your face.

    However, you CAN immediately determine things like muzzle velocity, position determining via sound waves, and how long it takes for one's life to cease after they've taken trauma to the cerebral cortex in the midst of a firefight.

  16. Lordshadow on December 14th, 2010 1:41 am

    There's a -1 troll lurking around. Commence medication. +1 gun GO. FOR SCIENCE!

  17. Tadferd on December 14th, 2010 2:31 am

    Doctor Freeman's is in the process of extensive field testing of the Hazard suit.

    During this testing he has also preformed numerous tests on the bullet resistance of Combine armor and resistance to impacts and explosions.

    He has dissected the bodies of those infected by headcrabs and has help protect the environment by recycling tools used for these dissections.

    Since the Combine took over we have been unable to research these new alien specimens, which makes Doctor Freeman's research extremely valuable.

  18. Zyquux on December 14th, 2010 3:30 am

    Heheh… "full-life"

    I see what you did there, therefore I will withhold the Grammar Hammer and just provide friendly advice: Human*.

  19. Sir_Nox on December 14th, 2010 9:26 am

    Save the world.

    Get stalked by guys in suits.

  20. wakamaka on December 14th, 2010 11:40 am

    I think Gordan Freeman is a pretty cool guy. eh kills aliens and doesnt afraid of anything

  21. Jade Catima on December 14th, 2010 12:47 pm

    My Professor Layton disapproves of your Professor Layton. <_<

  22. Deep Thought on December 14th, 2010 1:36 pm

    What do you mean not actual science… it's all about muzzle velocity and momentum. And "fucktons" of voltage

  23. oboewan on December 14th, 2010 4:44 pm

    This begs the question: what exactly happened during his MIT years?

    I WANNA GO TO MIT NOW.

  24. cAlTh3MAd on December 14th, 2010 7:03 pm

    Screw quantum physics, Freeman makes his own laws of the universe.

  25. IndianCHAN on December 14th, 2010 8:01 pm

    Can we just take away Shawn's Advice Meme skill? Or lack thereof. (AWW SNIZZAP DAWG)

  26. Luigi676 on December 15th, 2010 6:27 pm

    SAVE THE WORLD

    DON'T TALK TO ANYONE IN THE PROCESS

  27. Strike_low on December 16th, 2010 9:13 am

    There might not be science in game, but it sure has puzzle in it.

  28. Luigi676 on December 16th, 2010 4:17 pm

    Be specifically told not to go to Ravenholm

    Go anyway

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