Another fake TF2 update page? Sadly yes, none of these awesome Engineer upgrades will ever see the light of day… But we can dream, right?
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on October 22, 2009 · 5:41 PM 
FAILLAMENOT BADPRETTY GOODAWESOME (151 votes, average: 4.30 out of 5)
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Achievement Unlocked, Aerial Maneuvers, Explosives, Health & Fitness, Heavy Weapons, Movies, PC, Playstation, Portal, Science/Math, Secret Items, Team Fortress 2, Valve Software, Vaporware, Xbox 360

· Leave a comment (82 Comments)



  1. ConkerBirdy on October 22nd, 2009 9:52 pm

    D: the idle map on that page, it cant possibly be real D:

  2. SentryGunner on October 22nd, 2009 9:54 pm

    Oh what I would do for a floating exploding dispener…

  3. Techercizer on October 22nd, 2009 9:54 pm

    In before "it's a trap"

    And for a limited time only:
    In before "that update's a spy!"

  4. ConkerBirdy on October 22nd, 2009 9:56 pm

    baw, checked the rest of the website, its fake T___T

    baw some of them were epic

    unless.. valve will make us think its fake and then release it!

  5. MrRaccoon on October 22nd, 2009 10:04 pm

    Where id isotope?!

    You know where it is,don't you?

  6. GameboyPATH on October 22nd, 2009 10:10 pm

    Anhyone read the near-impossible achievements? Good God, man!

  7. OrionX on October 22nd, 2009 10:39 pm

    IT'S A- Dammit…

    But that update's a-- YOU SON OF A BITCH.

  8. BurnoutSpartan on October 22nd, 2009 10:39 pm

    The green letters are: R AIL GUN

    I wonder what theyre saying……

  9. Roflcopter419 on October 22nd, 2009 10:49 pm

    It'll make no difference to me, because microsoft doesn't let Valve update TF2 for Xbox 360.

  10. SentryGunner on October 22nd, 2009 10:54 pm

    When valve find a way to get enough memory (or something like that) back, they will be able to update it! (Although, don't expect it to be free…)

    Its why I moved from Xbox 360 to the PC version (that and I belive throwing jars of urine at people is my calling)

  11. Techercizer on October 22nd, 2009 11:05 pm

    It will explod!

  12. Techercizer on October 22nd, 2009 11:06 pm


    There's a flaw in your story, what kind of dog can't swim!??

  13. SentryGunner on October 22nd, 2009 11:07 pm

    A hotdog

  14. ArmyOfMidgets on October 22nd, 2009 11:17 pm

    A hot dog if in water stop being hot, therefor being a normal temperature dog, which can swim!!

  15. BoardBreaker93 on October 22nd, 2009 11:40 pm

    And the Engineer will look down from his high standing position and say "Screw you, you stinkin' spy! I'm doing science!"

  16. Ozymil on October 22nd, 2009 11:41 pm

    "Dammit, Spy's down!"

    "It's okay, we can bring him back with… THE NECRONOMICON!"

  17. nobrain on October 22nd, 2009 11:45 pm

    Well I guess that's what happens when you tap his sentry… HE TAPS YO FACE… full of nails? More like blasts them in.

  18. Techercizer on October 23rd, 2009 12:06 am

    Army of Midgets Win.

    Flawless Victory.

  19. Doc_ock_rokc on October 23rd, 2009 12:20 am

    actually that is due to some Memory size problems and the fact that MS wants to fucking charge the company for every download (aka not free)

  20. MrRaccoon on October 23rd, 2009 12:32 am

    Serious James is serious
    This comment is serious
    Both of them are win

  21. Leo058 on October 23rd, 2009 12:35 am

    HOLD IT!

    You all seem to be under the idea that the water is cold…
    yet where is your decisive evidence that it is not boiling water?!

  22. Acrazymonke on October 23rd, 2009 12:57 am

    umm build one?

  23. Davis007 on October 23rd, 2009 12:58 am

    Oh I dunno mabey its implying that the nail gun is really a Rail Gun.
    and yes. i know you're joking. on a completly unrelated note, it hurts just under my eye when I blink…..

  24. Acrazymonke on October 23rd, 2009 12:58 am

    ive got both so im fine

  25. Someguy5031 on October 23rd, 2009 1:08 am

    I think the Idle map joke was funnier.

  26. Ataeru on October 23rd, 2009 1:18 am

    What radioactive isotope is he using for that weapon?
    my guess is carbon-14 or fluorine-18, he has the technology to do so.

    being radioactive, it may have a poison effect, as such you cant just wait for it to end like fire. it slowly kills you until dead or a medic heals you.

  27. kirbyownsyou97 on October 23rd, 2009 1:21 am

    Enjoy the Cake Update

  28. Techercizer on October 23rd, 2009 1:33 am
  29. BurnoutSpartan on October 23rd, 2009 1:53 am

    Acid goes where?

  30. Senax on October 23rd, 2009 2:02 am
    Here, have another. I bet that if engies actually had this update, this would come to be accomplished by many.

    On a COMPLETELY UNRELATED NOTE, I slightly completely hate newcomers for killing spycrabs all the time.

  31. Senax on October 23rd, 2009 2:07 am

    Which really doesnt make sense because as updates are applied, more people will buy the 360 orange box. More people buying that means more revenue for MS. Hell, MS should be charged by TF instead!

  32. Techercizer on October 23rd, 2009 2:45 am

    Serious Sam's seariousness is seriouser.

    Alliteration is actually an ample alleviation of angst and apathy.

  33. Link_09 on October 23rd, 2009 3:31 am


  34. Link_09 on October 23rd, 2009 3:33 am

    Valve should really look into this….
    the community really has good ideas on weapons…

    a nailgun would fit engineer perfectly fine.

  35. Badonk on October 23rd, 2009 10:29 am

    why do people hate spys so? I mean you can make a gun that shoots nails, that would kill pretty well, but you have to go the extra yard and make them RADIOACTIVE?!?!

    Fuck you engineers

  36. ayanleman on October 24th, 2009 5:47 pm

    Ah. sorry then. it appears i did everything you said. i am sorry.

    In conclusion, I am a bloody twit.

    Sincerly, Ayanle Man

  37. sillychibi on October 24th, 2009 5:50 pm

    the nail gun would be awesome, like the medic with his needle gun.. i wish valve would stop goffing off with us and actually update

  38. TheAceOfSkulls on October 24th, 2009 11:58 pm


    I saw your hand list slightly to the left when you said Spy!

  39. TheAceOfSkulls on October 25th, 2009 3:11 am

    I enter and exit insanity so many times, I'd be my own planet if I had a cookie every time (no one really understands just how many voices are in my head. I don't just listen to 2 people on my shoulders, I have a congress in my head!).

  40. Sir_McCloud on October 25th, 2009 10:41 pm

    Nostalgia=Bill Nye
    Engineer= Bill Nye?

  41. chigocubsfan on March 2nd, 2010 12:17 pm

    i do believe i haz radioactive nails in myh face!

  42. Cactuspuncher on February 10th, 2011 11:50 am

    Can I let you sap that? Nope.

  43. Pupsrus13 on May 14th, 2012 10:02 pm

    Stuff that's already radioactive.

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