Insane scientific testing calls for insane scientific protective gear! Those boots literally work like magic! Also after playing Portal 2 for a bit, I couldn’t help but wonder what keeps Chell’s head from getting bashed open when she slams into the ceiling using an “aerial faith plate” over and over. Oh well just another one of life’s mysteries I guess!
By rjbman
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on April 19, 2011 · 8:51 AM
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Categories: Portal, Science/Math, Valve Software · Leave a comment (52 Comments) |
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Email your video game related LOLZ to and if it's good we'll post it!
Did you know the site has over 2,500 video game themed lolz? 
"But yeah, there's boots that will be able to take that stress."
There we go, problem solved. Screw logic, I have utility footwear. *Leans backwards; falls out of an airplane*
There's
an appa boot for that.Isn't the problem with portals in real life the part about the fucking portals in real life?
But there's nothing that can stop your organs from coming out of your ass
Problems gravity?
Well, the answer is obvious. We need to jump into infinite portals with a parachute.
Wow… three uploads in one day?
Hmmmm…….
WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO SHAWN?!?
I have heard of fucking portals in real life. I think they're called glory holes though.
Here at Aperture Science, we would like to point out that we laugh at the face of Physics, as we were studying how to build quantum space holes during college. This petty little argument, might I add, has already been made moot due to the fact that we've tried the boots! Guaranteed!
Suck it.
Kindly,
Aperture Science
Achievement unlocked: "Companion Tube."
Logic has no place in video games! In the 80s, floating platforms were everywhere! Explain the physics in that!
"Companion Lube"?
Duh, they were made of ANTI-GRAVITY! 8D
"Science is just another word for magic."
-StrongBad
DAMMIT NOW I CAN'T PLAY PORTAL ANYMORE!!!!
CURSE YOU INTERWEBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Challenge accepted
(later)
challenge revoked *shlpoignsejsnabanbl*
Problem BP?
Boots! Don't worry, valve's got everything covered…
Everything is lies… rel="nofollow">EVERYTHING IS LIIIIIIES!
Job well done *strokes evil mustache*
It will not stab you in the back, and in fact, cannot speak.
… well not with that thing in its mouth…
I know, I mean because of the first game all cake is fictitious, now EVERYTHING is a lie, I think I may even be a lie, I certainly know Candlejack is a…
Wait, so would every human have to wear these boots?
…what has been seen cannot be unseen.
theres only fall damage, no velocity damage… i like halo reach's use of velocity damage.
speed up fast enough with in monitor mode and turn back into a spartan and you will splatter yourself against a wall, ceiling, floor, whatever :D
so much for that technically advanced suit of armor when a pair of fancy shoes can do better
yeah, you know, like no one hears your arguments anymore? like when you moot a tv. it bottles my mind to think that they are the same word!
The Companion Lube might not, but the Companion Tube will certainly "stab" you in the back….
F***ing Portals…how do they work?
rel="nofollow">DEUUEAUGH
Don't you mean mute a TV? There's a difference between 'moot' and 'mute'.
Because bent sticks of plastic and Apple's new Iboot make you invincible
And nobody can forget the COMPANION BOOBS- *shot with rifle.*
Another problem they forgot to mention is THE FUCKING NOISE spawned when two portals, layered on top of each other, create an infinite loop. And you thought that Scream Resonance was painful…
Oh, I see. You think you are so smart with you're terminal velocity and air resistance. Well, if you're so smart explain fucking magnets!
YOU DARE BRING LOGIC INTO MY LAIR?!
Annnnd we're all going to hell again. Nick, what have we told you about playing the Devil's Advocate?
Scientists = Wizards then?
Hrm…
Does that make Gandalf the Middle Earth version of Carl Sagan?
To be precise:
"The word 'technology' means 'magic'. Or basically just the stuff you use and have no idea how it works. and when it breaks, you have to buy a new one."
Damn it, he *is* real! *chases after sean* You won't claim another human, you monster! *shoots at*
*Flip open a phone* Sir they know,what to do. * listen to the phone* I DON'T NEED WESKER HELP SIR.*listen to the phone some more* ok sir. *shoot hughbertesq* See i don't his help
Never plug your Devil's Advocate into a neurotoxin wielding AI system? That was the only lesson I learned today.
be thankful I didn't link a picture of one of those things <img src="http://www.rubbermasters.com/index_template_2_i00004a.jpg">
Oh God damn it, I think my hand is possessed, anyone got a chainsaw?
Just wear your Gunboats, you namby-pamby lab boy.
Look at you pretending that you're not really sure. Nobody's fooled. ;)
Those boots don't fix the fact that sometimes when I fly out of portals, I SLAM MY FUCKING HEAD INTO A CEILING.
What, did GLaDOS fit us with an invisible helmet or something?
I would imagine that would be like stepping on a grav panel in Dead Space 2
The obvious answer is that Chell is secretly a cartoon character. Laws of Physics only apply to her when convenient.
Cave Johnson. We're done here. *air-hump*
ok theres more than one problem with portals they defy the most basic laws of physics
imagine the following scenario:
[IMG ]http://i51.tinypic.com/30clt93.jpg[/IMG]
according to the law of conservation of energy this scenario is impossible since energy cannot be CREATED or destroyed
looking back into the infinite fall portal arrangement, the test subject shouldnt even be able to fall at all
to ilustrate this think of that portal arrangement as some sort of tunnel
[IMG ]http://upload.wikimedia.org/math/0/f/3/0f36df929ac9d711a8ba8c5658c3bfee.png[/img]
this means that there are 2 objects in this scenario, 1 of then is the test subject and the other is an object of great mass (enough to mimic earth's mass) at the end of the "tunnel", BUT WAIT the tunnel is INFINITE, which means that even if such 2nd object exists its mass must be also infinite in order to be able to have ANY effect on the test subject, such thing doesnt exist and the area between both portals is devoid of gravity
but the test subject wouldnt just float in between both portals he/she wouldnt be attracted the center of the object with the bigger mass in this scenario, the earth, he/she will be attracted to the area AROUND the portal
[IMG