Hey I’ll challenge anyone to a battle… whether they be preschooler, old man or working girl! Of course I’m not willing to pay $300 an hour for it.
By Gadget
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Posted by Shawn Handyside on March 25, 2011 · 2:46 AM
  (197 votes, average: 4.08 out of 5) Loading ... |
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Categories: Adult Situations, Motivational, Nintendo, Nintendo DS, Pokémon, Serious Business · Leave a comment (88 Comments) |
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Email your video game related LOLZ to and if it's good we'll post it!
Did you know the site has over 2,500 video game themed lolz? 
(4.86 out of 5)
Hey, there's all sorts of perks to this. Even if she's flat broke, she's got other ways of paying you!
Wow 50% of the front page is now Pokemon jokes… I may be an old fart but I seriously don't know what you guys see in that…
Pay for services.
Win battle with amulet coin.
Free services! (Just don't make eye contact until you've paid.)
You can be the first pimp to do the bitchslapping WITH YOUR POKEMON!!
What if I did it with an Aipom? Or Ampibom, even?
Bitch better hope I don't have Hitmonchan in my party!
Emboar's Arm Thrust would do some serious damage…as well as put that hoe in her place!
HOOKER used SWEET SCENT
Wild JOHN appeared
Go, HOOKER!
JOHN used HARDEN
JOHN used POUND
JOHN used POUND
It's a critical hit!
HOOKER used ENDEAVOUR
JOHN used STRINGSHOT
HOOKER used PAY DAY
Wild JOHN fainted!
You found 500
Pafter the battle!inb4IwanttoseeherMeowth/Skitty/Purrloinetc.
…why is there a cleavage thumbnail underneath the comment box?[/offtopic]inb4 string shot too
Gotta Hook 'em All!
PIMP used DOUBLESLAP
It's super effective!
I wouldn't pay her in Lemonade ($300) price per hour either Shawn. Those vending machines are everywhere and on Route 9 there's a Lemonade left in the middle of the road, like, DAILY. On second thought…FREE SEX…but then again…PokéHerpes…hmm…how DESPERATE AM I really?
Dude, I've already got that covered. Vine whip. DONE.
<img src="http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/129154801046618209.jpg">
As long as it's not Purugly, I'm in.
Ah the joys of unforeseen funny and awkward translation…
stringshot before harden!?
verily?
WE GOT A PREMATURE STRINGSHOT HERE!
QUICK! HE DOESN'T LIKE POKEMON!
DESTROY HIM!
*tackle*
Commenting on Halolz, you're doing it wrong.
I'd hit it.
<img src="http://images2.memegenerator.net/ImageMacro/6147945/Its-friday-DRIFLOONS-FOR-EVERYONE.jpg?imageSize=Medium&generatorName=Rebecca-Black-Fried-Egg" alt="" width="360" height="270" />
I'm not an old guy, but I find Pokemon to be boring as well, at least after playing 3-5 games with the somewhat same plot, with different characters (Start from first city > Defeat all Gym Leaders > Defeat evil organization in between > Defeat Elite Four > End game, catch all Pokemon or train your Pokemon)
Wouldn't you have lost the 500?
Least it's not as bad as the rape scene on the ferris wheel.
Also, careful. Hookers in Pokemon don't get paid to have sex. They battle you. LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.
So therefore, we're all hookers now.
You misunderstand, "you" in the example is the Pimp.
Well then I just fail.
Heck yeah! Balloons!
…Or am I misinterpreting?
Yep. I beat Pokemon Black in 37 hours approxiamately. I was devestated.
Should've been PLAYER. Would've been more obvious LOL.
PLAYER found 500P after the battle!
Well, you see, they're like pets… and you can control them… but they have these superpowers… so they're like pets with superpowers that you can control.
(Would have edited this into my other comment, but you fine folks had already replied to it when I came up with this)
HOOKER gained 250EXP
HOOKER leveled up! HOOKER is now level 28!
What? Your HOOKER is evolving!
Congratulations, your HOOKER has evolved into ESCORT AGENCY!
ESCORT AGENCY wants to fight!
Go, ENFORCER!
ENFORCER used DOUBLE-SLAP
It's not very effective…
ESCORT AGENCY used ATTACK ORDER!
It's super effective!
ENFORCER fainted!
PLAYER is out of usable Minions!
PLAYER blacked out!
(At least here it makes sense to lose half your money)
Prof. Oak: But is she really a girl, or a boy? AND WHAT IF IT'S DITTO AGAIN?!
PokéHerpes?
…Or Pokérus? Oho. Maybe those daycare takers only act like they know nothing of how eggs are made only to prevent the youth from getting any ideas. Moral of the story, ladies and gentlemen, is to enjoy "battling" if you'll ever be the best.
(inb4 no one was)
Ehem, Hooker Tricks for Pokemon:
The Crazy Mankey
Bulba's Bulb
The Zu BAT!
Muk Trench
Deep Victreebell
Reverse Ponita
Haunter
The Jynxer
Water Gun(Games)
Route 10 Rooter
Starmee Tickler
Muk Mouthwash
Grimer Gravy
Tangala Triple Touch
Rocky-Road Type
Spicy Gloom
Putting the Snorlax Down
Ghost-Typing It
T Bag al la Kengeskahn
If you chose the male trainer, go to the ferris wheel in the fall…
I'm pretty sure something goes on there…
Eh, it happens…
Also post # 666 is on the way for me…
2 more to go!
Or a blue waffle… never forget about the blue waffles… *shudder*
That's not a prostitute, that's a trainer. We sell those too.
…
I am very dissapointed in you.
I had balloons at school today in History. The teacher left the room and everyone started pullling out food and decorations. It was suitably amazing.
As long as you use PokéProtection, it doesn't really matter to an Oak.
I sell them in twos.
And Musharna.
And they will never poop on your carpet/bed/sofa!
You know, cause they really can't
…and TM 69 Rock Polish. He he he he…
I've noticed that too…the one female clerk in particular…and then she wishes that you were her younger brother…WINCEST?!? IN MY POKEMON?!? What.
Why does that idea conjure up an entirely different perverse thought?
what?!
i… dont… even….
FUCK THE POKEMON! GIVE ME MY MONEY! *puts up pimp hand*
Oh god the double pound reminds me of the machoke comic that was posted a while ago……
imagination fail
I hate Pokemon, but sure do love prostitutes! (Here come the -1's…)
They took out the ferris wheel conversations in the English version.
Are you referring to generation 1 TM-17 or the later TM-17?
In the latter case, I concur.
In the former case, sounds kinda kinky ;)
gross…
Hello… were are your edvise memes?
…*kicks him in the balls* THATS FOR NOT PLAYING THE AFTERGAME!!!!
WHHHAAAAATTTTTTTTTTT???????!!!!!!!!
… get out of here troll…
Latter case.
Is it ironic that stating your own fail nets you a higher e-peen?
I considered giving you a -1.
But I'll let you off the hook. THIS time.
Because you're generally awesome.
However, meeting a lvl 65 pokémon, trained, right after the "final boss" having a lvl 54 tops, is pretty damn scary. It got me pumped, and made me WANT to grind :D
At least I wasn't telling people to look it up!
Also: DO NOT WANT
There IS no aftergame. You hunt down the 7 sages in all the places that you've already been to. That's game…get Zoruark…Zorua…that's that. Pokémon Musicals have no ribbons…
Hmmm…I suppose it wasn't very gentrollmanly of me to even mention those here, huh?
I think it could have been worse, though. (Fair Warning: The link is SFW, but the links on that page most certainly are not.)
I'm sorry, but is there supposed to be a joke/reference/meme in there or is this just a case of bad grammar?
…with a hand cannon.
UH… I'm going to run before the grammar hammer hits… *runs to tvtropes.*
noob! there is aftergame! YOU DON'T KNOW?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
I'm sure Eliot Spitzer fits in here somewhere…
If that's true, then why did N take me on it and explain that he was the king of Team Plasma?
Professor Oak came as fast as he could when he heard you found a hooker.
Lies. There is nothing. I beat it. I KNOW. The replay value this generation is surprisingly low. :-/
I didn't mean that one; that's plot-related. I meant they removed the "suggestive" ones where you battle daily trainers.
It's still implied.. there is some dialogue
Which Drifloon can I take?
No, no. Tmotom's the local troll. We keep him around to get rid of the other trolls.
*Sees pic*
Waaait a minute…
WHAT THE FUCK IS MY BOTTOM BITCH DOING?
Can't let you do that, guy who's grammar sucks.
*Hammer time*
Related?
<img src=http://i303.photobucket.com/albums/nn139/Jester_Joe/1223156386_yWt9r-L.jpg>
Hey, quick question: how do you work a corner if your city is built in a circle???
BREAKING NEWS:
Red dies after being overwhelmed at which Driftloon he should take from the Global Trade Station!
[A joke on something my sister found on Facebook about how RB "died due to the overwhelming decision of choosing a seat at a football stadium" ~Fiera - Halolz 2010-2011 and Outside Knowledge Base]
"Gotta hook 'em all!
Gotta hook 'em all!
GARY OAK"
Kinda makes sense, although what he was probably referring to was the fact that there's an entire half-region waiting for you once you beat the game (the eastern side of Unova can't be travelled on until after the game's complete). Also, to compensate for lack of Gym Leader rematches, I believe they decided on having a once-a-day affair with two trainers on the level of the Champion -- namely Morimoto and Cynthia.
It could be, also, that the game's being geared a lot towards battles IRL -- and so puts an emphasis to the new Battle Subway and Battle Competition functionality, Pokemon Global Link as well for the GBU and DW…
Yeah, I've actually racked up more than a third of the time I've played on HGSS (that's saying something, since I've played over 350 hours on SoulSilver, and about 120 right now on Black). Just so you know, if you ever encounter me I'm the default name for each game I own (in SS, for example, Ethan). ~Fiera
LIES!!!
Pies?