I had no idea Link was such a mean drunk!
VenomPB adds: “He can quit any time he wants.”
Posted by Shawn Handyside on September 24, 2009 · 6:10 AM |
Categories: Bad Ideas, Nintendo, The Legend of Zelda, Wii · Leave a comment () 128 Comments |
|
FIRST OLOL
look guys he's drunk!!!1 HIlaRIIUSSS xxxx
okay I'm sorry I've ruined this forever
So I stop in the local bar you know people,
I go to the bar, I ring my coat, I call the bartender
Said "Look man, come down here", he got down there
So what you want?
One bourbon, one scotch, one beer
Well I ain't seen my baby since I don't know when,
I've been drinking bourbon, whiskey, scotch and gin
Gonna get high man I'm gonna get loose,
need me a triple shot of that juice
Gonna get drunk don't you have no fear
I want one bourbon, one scotch and one beer
One bourbon, one scotch, one beer
The Barman:
"It's dangerous to go sobre, take this!"
Hey buddy, I think you've had enough Chatue Romani for one night pal…
I'm gunna have to take that ocarina from you…
Pfft. They don't serve alcohol in Hyrule. Only milk laced with alcohol (a.k.a. Chateau Romani. The infinite magic was only a drunken hallucination).
Link: **** you, if you'd seen half the shit I've seen you'd need this more than me.
Vodka. Gin. Beer. YOU WANT IT? It's yours my friend!
As long as you have enough self-pity.
"Hey Listen! I'll tell you when I've had enough….
Hey baby, bombs, bottles and weapons aren't the only large thing my pants carries…"
Next morning when Link wakes up hungover in bed, turns out that Zora he took home is actually a Goron.
"Hey Listen! I'll tell you when I've had enough….
Hey baby, bombs, bottles and weapons aren't the only large thing my pants carries…"
Next morning when Link wakes up hungover in bed, turns out that Zora he thought he took home is actually a Goron.
Makes Me Think Of Video Game Confessions on TGWTG.com
Lluz im scuh a dnurk ass mtheor fcuk.
"Dammit, Navi, I keep tellin' you to shut up when I'm drinkin'!"
"Sir, that's the exit sign…"
Hey Zelda, your clock wont flush!
The Vodka of Courage to ask someone out, the Roofie of Power (if she says no>_>), and the Tequila of Wisdom to drown the pain down.
"The Triforce is Complete!"
-passes out-
Sir, I think you've had enough…
Link: DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM!?!
…Link?
NO, I'M KAFEI. I'M LINK, HERO OF TIME!
Sir, I think you should leave.
Also, to Leo058: The milk was in Termina and OOT Hyrule. Real alcohol is in Twilight Princess at Telma's Bar.
Link: Shaddap, i'm good to drive. I'm not as think as you drunk I am!
News Anchor: This is what the Hero of Time was alledged to have said before he left the bar that night. Later that night: Epona was found wrapped around a tree. Link was charged with a DUI, public endangerment, and riding a horse backwards down the wrong side of a road. Link then ran away with his pants on his head claiming to be someone named "Pantsman". It is a sa day indeed for Hyrule…
Link may need to go learn the Song of Sobering next…
By Falcon does he looked pissed off or what?
Some hours later in the next corner:
"Hey listen! Link! Hey! Listen! Don't barf!…"
thats why whenever he saved a town in the two N64 games they all had the same characters… it wasnt some kind of alternate reality… he was just drunk the whole time!
"I'm drunk! You don't have an excuse!"
"Is there an officer, problem?"
"I'm not a tipsy, I'm just a bit drunk."
"I swear to drunk, I'm not God."
That's all I've got for standard drunk lines, but for Link we've got some good drunk ramblings.
"When I was a kid, everything was always bright and cartoony… And we were allowed to get away with stabbing a sword though Ganondorf's forehead! Now, you'd be slapped with an M and get banned in Australia for that!"
Don't drink & ride!
FINALLY. A recent submission that's not Kanye-based! Even better, it's actually pretty damn good.
Link: WHAT'D YOU SAY ABOUT ME MOTHER?!?!?! Ohhh, right, I have no mother….
Here's to the past then!
I've saved her ass twenty goddamn times. When's that bitch gonna put out?
if you were from where i was from youd be !@#$n dead
He should of listen to navi's warnings.
Also, 69 E-Peen! New Avatar!
Regardless of how much you drink, Tingle cannot be unseen…
Cheap absinthe with the extract of Poe Soul mixed in. That shit will fuck you up.
*humming the Zelda theme, but seriously offbeat*
Hey, hey get up. Come on pal.
Link: Buh….wuh? Where am I?
Listen it's 10 in the morning. We're closed. Go get your girl and get outta here.
Link: *burp* Girl? *turns, sees over-turned table* Midna…Hey wazzup girly? *falls down*…Wait, you said 10 in the morning! It's the final day! Skull Kid's gonna kill me! *surprised, then serious, holding FD mask* Skull Kid….
Bartender: Is that guy still rambling on? Get him outta here!
Rescuing… rescuing the princess… I'm so into that shit… i mean… LISTEN TO ME!… I'm not even supossed to talk! D:<
this is not new, no one sober would ever say YATTT! YAAAUGHT! HAAAA!
It wouldn't surprise me if Navi's incessant "advice" were somehow responsible for Link's alcoholism.
is it just me or does it look like Link's pointing at the title text and saying "When did that get there?"
Please do not let him to drive…
You drink
You drive
You lose!
http://www.halolz.com/2008/04/06/you-drink-you-dr…
(drunk)you know that blu man group? total ripoff of the smurfs! and you know the smurfs?they suck!
YO LINK I KNOW YOU'RE TRYING TO GET TANKED AND IMMA LET YOU FINISH, BUT SOLID SNAKE WAS THE BEST INTOXICATED HERO OF ALL TIME! OF _ALL_ TIME!
And one too many drinks later…
IMMA FIRIN MAH VOMIT BLEHHH
Link: "Get that camera outta my face!!!!!
Alright Link, you not fit to ride Epona home tonight, give me you ocarina.